Poetry Cafe's, Steven Fry and a Most Annoying Me

I wanna go to a poetry cafe.... In a pink beret and two giant earrings Sporting a very serious intelligent expression which is obviously not my own So ill borrow it from some super being like Steven Fry Just for the night (he can sit at home looking daft, looking me) As i fly into the realms of fantasy Stood in all my regalia, pink floral wellies and beige checkered hacking jacket Purple courderoys Spilling my beans My limited means of getting my Very Unimportant Point across..... Whilst The avante guarde and Mrs Bohemian nod and shake As my word snake slithers from my agile tongue The one which spits bile the one which wreaks havoc when im just being mum I wanna watch the candles flicker and smoulder With a man bag over one shoulder Chuffing One Giant Havanna cigar Peace man, way out, too far....... I wanna travel triumphant on the train Back home again Resting my feet on the opposite seat (just because its wrong) Leaning drunken pon my wonky umbrella Singing that most annoying song 'Pardon me Sir..... is that the cat hoo chewed me new shoes? ' Whilst bemused commuters gaze on Why ever not! Cause Im a whimp...thats why