My Bi-Polar Situation

I hate this life with a growing passion. Its my fault. I made it this way. Ive lost my compassion. But like that hardly matters now, with my face against the ground and a knife sticking out my back. Your betrayal. A quick slap to my already cut face. I feel so sorry that I hurt you. I told you that already. But you ignored me and decided to lash at my turned body. Inside out you broke and cut me. I still feel bad... and wish to apologize but im afraid to Im to frightened of the fact you can hurt me with any of your words. You could kill me if you wanted.