Missed Call

My phone is vibrating yet again. I picked up my phone and see a number and a name flashing. To most this would be pure excitement to me it's an annoyance. Which one is it going to be today? I close my eyes until the vibration stops and a message flashes across the screen that says missed call. I just missed another prospective lover or in the way I like to think about it another heartache. You see if you can't reach me don't take offense ... Don't think i'm trying to play you it's just my personal tactic of avoidance. If on a daily basis you get my answering machine don't feel bad just let go because i'm in the witness protection program and i'm trying to keep things exactly the same yet make dramatic renovations. I want to make sure no one else hurts me like this... yet im attracted to this mistreatment almost an addiction. So sorry caller but im having a hard time keeping my focus on picking up when all I really want to do is ignore. Stay in this bubble of unchangeable things because just maybe if I don't pick up I will stay miserable. Stay exactly the same. I hate the thought of myself drifting. Waiting for that one call... waiting to hear that sorry echo across the line. Just waiting to fall back into that one callers arms, a call I could never miss. A call that i've been anticipating. My life is on hold, so close to pause. So for all you missed calls out there im sorry but im too occupied to answer.