In My Blood

They said it's in my genetics from generations in the past, My ancestors struggled with the same demons I face, My up's, down's, mania's and I'm a consistent outcast, The day I was born was the beginning of my crisis of faith. "Oh, what a lovely little girl full of joy and sassiness," The signs were all there that I would struggle one day, For in my blood I have inherited the will to be depressed, And since that day I realized no one knew what to say. Little girl growing up just to try to please everyone, Teenager full of angst and suffering break downs, Don't get me wrong, I've had a lot of fun, But with too much liquor and so quickly did I drown. Receiving genetic transmissions from all my predecessors, Full of regret and shamefulness encompassing my soul, Falling into the forever trap of high school's peer pressure, Spinning and swerving and sleeping too far out of control. By the time I hit thirty years old I cleaned up my act, Sought professional help and support of my family, Finally I have put forth sincere effort to get back on track, Said one last goodbye to my distant best friend calamity. See...these things I've been bestowed may sound bad, But if not for the hell I wouldn't be heaven bound, For in my blood there is triumph and I DON'T have to be sad, And serenity and confidence I have finally found. Why were there so many snakes crawling through my blood? And how did I kill them at such a young age? All the black electricity flowing through my body I unplugged, And in the book of my journey I have flipped one more page. Date Written: November 28, 2015