I Genius, Well Sort Of

I am a genius I must profess I have a Doctorate in bundling And one in making my life a mess. Everything I turn my hand to My efforts soon turn to dust I'm a knight in armour But covered in dents and rust. I once had a date But turned up three hours late Nearly got married once Until her mother locked the church gate Went on a cruise once but the boat sank And I got the blame For hammering a picture nail In my cabin in the cabin ranks. I was the only one in school to get rickets And ringworm on my head And had to sleep in the garden shed They took me from school to have a brain scan And the Doctor said I was ok There was nothing there Well I took him lithely And have worried ever since I swear. I was never picked for the football team Just in case something went wrong And I couldn't join the school choir Because people held their hands to their ears And ran away whenever I burst into song. Always got the blame for everything at home Even if it was someone else but me I was brainwashed into thinking I was useless And now sadly I agree It's not that I don't try But I'm never lucky you see I'm an albatross around peoples knecks A Jonna and all washed up at sea. I'm probably the most unlucky man The world has ever seen But doesn't that then make me a success? If you know what I mean?. Peter Dome.Copyright.2015.June.