Dis-Order

I sit here twitching, shaking, in a panic I don’t want to do this again, I hate feeling frantic Don’t let this happen, don’t let me slip away Into the darkest depths of my mind, nothing to say At first these experiences seem inviting But here there’s no such thing as deciding The light is so bright and luminous at first Until its’ quickly dimmed and the pain it causes hurts The darkness creeps in like a predator With the dim light as it’s’ competitor Who’s going to win this time, this fight? Who’s going to give the hardest bite? Stuck between pure happiness and sadness There is no explanation to this uncomfortable madness Waiting, waiting; for this too shall pass While the emotions in my head encompass My heart surrounding the insufficiencies of my head The feelings so heavy as if my heart is fashioned out of lead Like I’ve got shackles on my hands and around my feet In this state of mind everything seems obsolete