A Tortortous Kind of Love- a Letter To My Father

Dear father... Saying I hate you would be a lie Because that's an understatement There's more to it than pure hatred Cause mine towards you is a different kind Its a fusion of natural adoration and built up disgust poured into a bowl of bitterness We both know you refused your package Yet your very opinionated self knew right from the start this package was yours How do you look at yourself in the mirror or the least sleep peacefully at night I'd love to think you were denied a conscience no matter how lowly you try to prove you own one Its sad you took the "think before you act" and "action have consequences" for granted Cause clearly they don't seem to be affecting you at all But somewhere out there is a shattered soul, devoid of life due to a series of circumstantial actions you have refused to account for Given a calling to sentence you for killing this soul I would GLADLY rip open your veins and arteries to watch you bleed to death or maybe Cut the fleshy and borny parts of you into tiny sizeable pieces, burn them to ashes and let the vegetable garden use some ash fertilizer for growth...how about that? You have no idea how pleasurable it would make me feel To grind your successful empire into nothing more than a useless folder stored in a recycle bin Yet what reality holds in me is actually the opposite I curse not but pray God will bless you I cry no more as the tears are held back by rejection's gravity But when gravity is overwhelmed, tears overflow daily Yet in each tear comes along more love How torrid wouldn't you say? Do you see how tortorous your effect is on me I mean who searches for what needs not to be found? Tragic ,my butchered naivety does everyday So now give me an answer to my never ending questions Will you? Your daughter..