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What it is, this pain that kills my joints This strange duvet of darkness while I try to brush my teeth What it is, the distance to my wheelchair seems to have increased in this small room What it is, this self-inflicted isolation This fear of seeing people and of losing them Swimming in a dark damp pool Hearing people talking yet Can't see them, here's the fool That wants to dance but stays in bed Splendid colours hurt instead What is not the wish to block While at the same time all is gone And nothing stays in harmony They speak and I hear their concern It does not concern me, still it gnaws My consciousness, my shame, my guilt I better not be here, they better off without me Don't worry, I'm only showing you The me I am when I'm depressed But everyone is not going through The same, we're different: at best We share the overwhelming sadness That has no words enough to describe What it is. But this is what it always is: Don't leave us please, for even at the point of our deepest rejection of you, it really is a cry to stay! How contradictory we are This is for me, it is for every person who Is right now in dire need..... Here are my hugging arms 'round you Until you're back on your two feet.
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