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For awhile now I've felt nothing but torture and torment throughout my mind and heart because as of now we are still apart can't sleep at night and don't want to face the day yet the remembrance of you never goes away I feel like I'm losing my mind see sometimes the good in me is so hard to find still family and friends are so kind even thought I've been gone from all them for a bit we thank God we're just meant to fit they are there when I need to talk and give me a shoulder to cry on when things seem out of reach some tell me deep profound messages that hit me really hard like stoop searching for all of us and search for yourself or they tell me your not crazy it just sounds like your still in love and he made you the happiest you've ever been able to be you also need the questions you have answered and we don't have them you have to find him I believe with you back in my life things would be better and I would once again be the person I once was and long to be again but then the harsh reality set in and even though I want to see you desperately we may not be able to find each other again and it's this I have to face but I don't want to or I have to consider that maybe you won't feel the same way as I do even though I feel so much down deep in my heart you are in love with me to I know all this sounds crazy that's what I've been trying to say but it's on overwhelming feeling I've had for a long time and this will not go away I've never felt this way about anyone or for anyone else before or after you I really do try to remember having patience is the key to happiness but I need to know where is the damn door or that all things come to those who wait how much longer do I have to keep waiting it's been hell on me cause I've been waiting so damn long I've prayed to God to end my life for these reasons and more I just can't do it myself yet I wake each morning to face yet another day right now I can no longer control what's happening around me and don't know how to deal with it if seeing you again is not in the game plan for us what I wish for you more than anything is that you are happy and well that's all I've ever wanted you to be and I hope all your dreams have and keep coming true maybe someday the rest of mine will to because if you didn't already get it I'm still in love with you
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