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For years I was so hurt inside, I blamed myself for your suicide, If only I took more time to care, Dear Lord, if only I was there, You poured your heart out on the table, Said you couldn't deal with life and your heart was unstable, Said you couldn't stop drinking with tears in your eyes, Held my hand, and said your the only one I've loved my whole life, I placed limitations and put up a wall, I never thought within weeks you would be gone, People said don't blame yourself, it's not your fault, Yet I know I could've done more so try telling that to my heart, I tell everyone I love them now as I walk away, Those three little words I never got the chance to say, It changed me inside to make more of an effort, To not just sit back quietly, and to address what matters, I'm quicker to forgive and trying to understand, I'll put up with the ridicule and still hold your hand, I've stood quietly through many storms, Until that person realizes that the love means more, When God says fight the good fight, this is what I see, It took severe heartache for me to be, Who I am today opposed to yesterday, This moved my heart to change, And in that regret, God counteracted that guilt, To love more deeply, to share with the world, The scar may be there, and pains my heart, Because I know these are the things that try to tear us apart, And when you touch my soul, I will cry for you too, Because I can understand what your going through, Through those tears there is healing, and the love is very real, Because we then come face to face with what we feel.
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