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Advice For Women Regarding Men Check your man to see if he has teeth If he has more than one and lots of money He’s the one The same goes for hair If he has one strand, he is your man, so reel him in A solid posterior and nice biceps are good for exercise and sex The best thing about a man is not his size It is his eyes, (or is it wallet?) The man with a car trumps a bicycle rider every time when dating Beware of men who love their mothers way too much Momma’s boys are toys that have no gender If you have a man, keep him from fire hydrants Never let him talk to strangers or girls with names Make him lift the toilet seat Tell him it builds muscles and that he’s sweet Walk him on the pavement by a leash, not on the lawn Men will pee on anything that breaths or lives in nature Remember, men are masturbators With other nasty habits, too numerous here to mention So give your man a beer. That is my best advice Check him daily for fleas and ticks and lice Before you kiss good night
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