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How hard could it be on a beautiful Saturday? Brian calls us, “Hurry up. They are taking Dad to the hospital.” Brian meets me at the door, ”Dad didn't make it.” I scream, “Oh my God.” I crumple into a ball just outside the hospital door. I yell, “Why, my God, why, my Dad?” I turned purple (that's what Brian said.) I compose myself; I get up and we walk into that little room. How hard could it be to say goodbye to my heart? He's lying there, a tube sticking out of his mouth. I touch him, still warm, I say, “I'll miss you.” They leave, I turn back, I touch him, still warm, I say, “I love you a million.” I walk out, tough as nails, quaking on the inside. In my head I hear, “You can do it Den.” I feel a hug and a kiss on the cheek. How hard can it be to bury my Dad? Sunday, we all meet at mom's, we talk, we hug, we cry. Monday, we all meet at mom's; we talk, we hug, we cry. Tuesday, the wakes, double dread. I stand there, tough as nails, quaking on the inside. “You can do it,” he says to me. Wednesday, the funeral, all the flowers, over 280 people saying goodbye to my Dad. I hear him still, “You can do it.” Thursday, I sit here writing this poem, tears run down my face. “You can do it,” he is saying to me. Friday, we will bury my Dad's ashes; a copy of this will be put in that little wooden house-shaped box. We will cry; I know it. His spirit will surround us with his love. He'll give us all hugs and kisses all around. How hard can it be to go on? “My God, Jesus, please help me.” I hear Jesus saying, “Trust in me and your burdens will be lifted.” “Dad, why did you leave us so soon?” I hear Dad saying,” It was my time and I was ready to go home. Don't cry for me. Celebrate my life and have a party. I will always be sitting next to you, Den. You can do it.” Hugs and kisses all around. Thank you, Jesus, my heavenly father. I trust in you and praise your name. And thank you Dad for your unconditional love,unselfish support and your heartfelt hugs and kisses. I`ll be okay. See you soon. I love you.
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