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i break down once more, lost falling off of the highest precipice of my own bitter consciousness tumbling down, crumpling to the floor in a pile my worn and sagging shoulders crushed with the weighty knowledge of this injustice that is my ceaseless torment this abysmal internal darkness which claws into my mind driving me mad with sorrow and fear and contempt now i pound and plead, shudder and scream my blue button eyes spilling saltwater and i find myself wrapping limp, lifeless arms around my sack body; shields to ward off this desperate, terrible loneliness that is growing inside this empty husk of me for my stitching has torn, and my sides have ripped and i've spilled all that i am onto the carpet; all of the sawdust and cotton fluff the silly stupid meaningless nothing that makes up my entire existence now all that remains is this hollow aching inside of my fabric body a hungering for an escape, anything anything anything please this slow throb that drowns out all else reminding me forever more that i am and have always been truly alone.
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