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A Victim of Slander By Elton Camp An old lady once lived in the forest so deep On day she was lying in her bed half-asleep Then there came a noise she’d heard before People outside, but not knocking at the door “Oh, Gretel, this cottage should taste so good.” He’d found it was made of sweets, not wood Hansel and his sister then tore the house apart But to do that without asking wasn’t very smart “It’s kids damaging my little house some more. Several times I’ve had to put up with that before.” The crone hobbled to the door to ask ‘em inside Not even once for vandalism did she them deride Although their conduct had been extremely rude, She sat them at her table and gave them some food So to Hansel she gave his own private little room Gretel became her housekeeper with a straw broom On Hansel’s health the woman checked each day And checked to see how much the boy did weigh But despite all the things that for them she did do, They ended up giving reason her kindness to rue As if damaging her house wasn’t quite bad enough, From her visitors there came even much worse stuff And although the brother and sister looked very cute, The helpless old woman they proceeded to execute So if lost and homeless children show up at your door, It doesn’t even pay to try to help them out anymore As with that old lady, your reputation they may besmirch It’s better that you play it safe and leave them in the lurch
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