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Sometimes it’s hard to face the woman in the reflection glass. Because she and I, we so often clash. Even though she looks just like me. She is not whom I thought I would see. Because there are things about her that are scary. She is the part of me I wish to bury. But I know one must face fact. It is often true, I hate the way I act. The selfishness that builds inside. The things I have sacrificed for foolish pride. My words are often quick to blurt. They are so often out of anger and meant to hurt. My hands have not always been gentle and kind. My thinking has been foolish and blind. Too many times I should have been strong, Why is it so hard to say it when I am wrong? There is so much I’ve done, that I can not be proud. And it seems too little too late just to say it aloud. It took a million stuttered words to admit. I took all I had to sit down and look at it. Ti took a thousand miles to get to this place. It has taken me a long time to look myself in the face. I had to dig deep and face the things I didn’t want to see. And only then I realized this isn’t who I wanted to be. It’s hard to really look at your self and see the wrong. Especially knowing it’s been this way all along. It’s sobering to face your self amongst downfall. To see your self, clearly, faults and all. Sarah Comstock 6-12-08
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