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You are now an outsider No longer part of the mechanism Not needed, surplus to requirement, redundant Your mind slowly blunting at the bottom of the bottom drawer of life The eyes of others betray derision and contempt Fearful of catching your disease Keeping a distance, loathing your weakness and inability A moment of pseudo sympathy and they’re gone, you’re of no further use to them Every rejection is an undeniable confirmation of your failure Affirmation is everywhere; you just never saw it before now Self-confidence, ground down with every counter-opinion to yours Your worth is worthless and your prospects worth less than that Pride declines charity yet you wish they’d persist Dismissal and a cynical laugh is your antidote to their wise advice Don’t you think I have thought of that? Or tried this? You say Embarrassment at your own ineptitude has become hostility Your child's face is a gallery of unconscious naivety You draw her in close, a surrogate for decent food and warmth Inwardly you cry for her and, perhaps, more for you at your inability to provide You’re not sure how or when it will end but certainly...it will end Slowly, yet quite perceptibly, you have become the person you once scorned You now comprehend the reason for their shabby appearance You realise that hesitance isn’t stupidity but a fear of making a wrong impression You can now walk a mile in another man’s shoes…until they wear out
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