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Goodbye six pack hello* poetry scribes My poetic side COSMOFUNNEL wordsmith thanks tumblr in his noggin ofttimes triggering babbling brook to swell after deluge becoming stream of consciousness runnel carving, gouging, and liquidating topography qua zee mow toe natural formed tunnel. Digitally remastered and revised since original version rejected, thus writer released, purposely leaked, and flooded mass media courtesy the following self branded watershed vaunted unabridged sprawling questionable and deplorable creation loosed upon unassuming readers. Analogously linkedin with once upon a time one doodling dandy Yankee slender man, whose yang upended, overshadowed, and eclipsed mine yin, nevertheless, now yours truly self anointed as an elder statesman - ha gifted with unwanted inxs of abdominal adipose tissue (attributed to agent provocateur of aging, which affects my metabolism and/or courtesy unwanted side effect reaction from one or more of the eight medications nurse practitioner at Penn Psychiatric Center Phoenixville, Pennsylvania location Elizabeth Clark prescribes), which gained weight foments tussle a fight to the death, I can never win and alternately titled: arm ugh gut tin yours truly loathes to mensch shin one alien looking pear shaped humanoid with redskin liposuction advised courtesy Doctor Quinn (a fictional character and magician, I took poetic license created above to help eradicate body dysmorphia), she waved her wand and poof transformed me into a puffin. Aye dread getting undressed and/or getting washed even without spectacles thar haint no mo' six pack ab, which nearly rock ribbed mid equatorial zone shape shifted into corpuscular blubbery ancillary physiognomy where aye wanna bab bull posttraumatic stressed out middle age battle of the bulge in summer re: a waisted effort squarely (er rather roundly) testing the elasticity of extra large sweatpants, when straining to hide expanding girth definitely producing undesirable effect, (especially when floating in briny deep, I squarely, honestly and closely resemble the Chinese brother who swallowed the sea strongly urging, necessitating, and exhorting mister crab to clamp down with pincers, viz primitive liposuction, whence rustling scupper will efface this fleshed out human bloviated ruggedly handsome man of the webbed wide world a bit heavy around the equator over self indulgent fleshpot unable, uneager, unready, and unwilling to maneuver his portly ill proportioned body inducing unprovoked stares, and tears for fears eyes tracking billowing supersize shirt resembling trireme sails being trimmed, where fleshly freighted sloop displaces entire watery expanse stranding, stinging and starving an a ray of underwater species, now prolonging requisite inhalation; I seek desperate sticktoitiveness guidance courtesy Younan Nowzaradan with steely mettle hie trite to iron out flab thus tis part and parcel of senescence, yet auxiliary buttressed dermis effect forming gorged girth giving "love handles" grab reigniting reign of terror viz prepubescent anorexia nervosa, boot strapped now - wen remembrance of things past frankly zapped distorted self-image evoked holocaust images repugnant; buttery rolls of fat insta jab stubborn thoughts of self-loathing entice me to become a lab bore a tory guinea pig/ scapegoat role to restore prime of life build when five foot ten obviously me no Lemuel Gulliver alignment could now perchance nab first place in a slick couture magazine from the neck down, cuz face mottled with nine inch nails clawing skin wrought unsightly scab taut torso bearing fashion model and senior citizen idol, where every place I go receiving venue offers free tab. To stand stock still until shutterfly would SnapChat rippled tummy, could fill my hungry wallet with inxs of cash now, aye haint so gorge ass, WhatsApp with faux pregnant protuberance, though thankfully derriere still rather dash shing, which palmolive pilot sized buttocks doth newt offset sorry to report lost battle of the bulge, where diet tribes furloughed in a flash abandoning their respective stations, gnome hatter sinusoidal parabolic frontispiece finds me to gnash my toothless mouth for lack of means to stave of the depredations of slump pin proletariat allowing me a hash sheesh priceline tag with hefty weight, acquiescing this Pillsbury doughboy blivet to subject himself to the sharp stings of a cool whip lash bearing the snap against raw skin as due process and supplication for atlas shrug gin his broad shoulders at the fountainhead naming me mash shew Scott in regard to oblate inflation insulation fiberglass around midsection, and how ma late mum (an avid fan of doctor Carleton Fredericks, who preceded Mehmet Oz), would quash the love she showered on this sole heir - resorting to exhaustive palliatives - even ear rash shun null gambits, and as last ditch effort putting this offspring on par with an albatross - vamoose get out with the trash unless everything (pertaining to indelible stubborn blubber comes out at the whoosh she wash Diet of worms.
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