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My dear brother Butch, Hair are the highlights of my week: I got a job at the Hairway to Heaven salon! Our motto: "We color your hair or dye trying" When the interviewer said "I mustache you a question..." I answered, "May I mullet over?" Seriously, working there is a shear delight, with some nice fringe benefits They're a real cut above the rest and I shave a lot of money on hair products... I bought Dad a comb for Father's Day… I bet he'll never part with it It is a long drive to the salon, but now I know all the short cuts Oh hey, I know hair-growth seminars are not your style, but call up your receding hairline buddies and comb on over! It was great to see you last week, you are looking so trim! I still feel terrible about the curling iron incident… You can rest a-sheared I'll straighten it out but I mussed warn you, you might get fro straighted Just remember, $15 for a hairpiece is a small price toupée You may not like short hair at first, but it will grow on you ...that's the mane thing Did you hear Mom and Dad had a brush with death? It was a very hairy situation with a real twist: buzzing down the highway at a decent clip someone tried to cut them off Mom was ready to wig out, curl up and dye, but thankfully Dad went to great lengths to avoid an accident so there was no permanent damage you had to see it to be-weave it Ok, time for a couple of jokes to lighten the mood: How does the man on the moon trim his hair? Eclipse. Why did Pavlov have such fabulous looking hair? Conditioning. Why do felines groom with their tongues? They can't find their catacombs. Why did the little girl watch "Black Stallion" more than "Babe"? She liked pony tales more than pig tales. What was the barber's sign before he went on vacation? "Hair today, gone to Maui" Did you hear about the novelty store selling fake piles of dung? It was sham poo. Just teasing! Take hair, Curly
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