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“So tell me…what’s adopting like? Seems a little risky - picking out your children from the local lost and found! Suppose the kid’s a ‘loser.’ Do they let you bring ‘em back? Can you - if it doesn’t work - return them to the pound?” Eldon’s callous words betrayed his negative perception of what my wife and I had done…but we were well prepared. Many times before these types of questions had been asked by those whose folks, for them - we felt - had never truly cared. People raised by parents that were bent on getting rich. Moms and dads who’d failed to show their open arms to them. Feeling it was bitterness that prompted his remarks, this is how, to make him understand…I answered him: “Friends of ours - while driving up to Saddleback - to ski - lost control on icy roads, and both of them were killed. Their only child survived the crash, but - being five years old - was far too young to comprehend the void that needed filled. “Suddenly an orphan - she was taken by the county - and put up in a foster home - with folks she’d never met. My wife and I, at once, began proceedings in the hope that custody of Dani Jo was something we could get. “Loving kids the way we do…and being family friends…Gail and I were confident we’d qualify for sure. She had no aunts or uncles…all her parents’ folks were dead…and both of us can tell you what most orphan kids endure. “Gail was only three years old when cancer claimed her mother. She never knew her father - he was killed in Vietnam. And left on someone’s covered porch when I was two years old, I, like her, was nurtured by a foster dad and mom! “Both of us have super folks, and great extended fam’lies, but wisely weren’t informed about the fact that we’d been “placed” Until we’d reached our teenage years because our parents knew that learning this would be the toughest thing we’d ever faced. “And they were right. We took it hard, but raised the way we were - both of us were happy kids. Our lives are filled with love. And so is Dani Jo’s, because, you see, for all this time…her happiness was all that Gail and I’ve been thinking of. “Anxious and determined to repair the broken heart of someone that my wife and I had known since she was born, We tried to fill her parents’ shoes the best way that we knew. While knowing that the fam’ly life from which she had been torn “Never could be duplicated - only born in mind - Gail and I revised our “plans” and filed to take her in. And now - for having had the chance to raise her - there’s no way that I can overemphasize how grateful we have been. “Plus I can guarantee you, Dani Jo has always known tons of love and understanding - just the way she had Before that tragic afternoon when fate destroyed her world, leaving her to cope with life without her mom and dad. “And while her heart was healing she would keep us on our toes by conjuring up comparisons for which we weren’t prepared. She wondered why we’d wanted her…and if we truly loved her…asking early on to know exactly why we’d cared! “Being merely neighbors, I can easily understand how she found it difficult to fathom what we’d done. Gail could not have children, so…for us to have a child…adoption was our only means for ever having one! “While hating how it came to be - the voids that needed filled seemed to be our destinies…for both - a second chance… And knowing God will sometimes soften tragedies in life by helping out its victims with the wishes that he grants, “Gail and I had prayed and prayed that those who were in charge would fail to find a better home than ours for Dani Jo. It took the better part of seven months to get it done, and that, I’m very proud to say…was fifteen years ago! “So, Eldon…to your question: ‘Can you take the ‘losers’ back?’ Obviously they’d want you to - if things went really bad - But you don’t have to worry, ‘cause you’d never get a child....and I would pity any kid that had you for a dad!” PS: I've now got 4 new Audio-CDs - @ 4 1/2 hours each = (62 diversely varied pieces). They’re listed on EBAY - under - “Mark Stellinga Poetry” - or available by simply contacting me at -- mark@writerofbooks.com -- should those of you who enjoy listening to poems as well as reading them - and particularly those of you that travel - care to be so entertained. (We use safe and simple - PayPal) There are a bunch of my pieces on YouTube as well --- Cheers, Mark
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