Get Your Premium Membership

White Clouds, Dark Clouds

White clouds, dark clouds Puffy white clouds float by smiling They know we think they are very cool The dark clouds follow, but they're not happy with the negative viewpoints of those who observe them Dark clouds have feelings, and they matter too We need to love them, just like the white clouds Love them especially when they are sad Sad clouds give you rain when they cry out loud Dark, White, Pink, Yellow Clouds when young don't see colour Only happiness When does that innocence fade And turn into suspicion John Derek Hamilton August 15,2016 Crystalline 2 lines syllable count 8/9 Kimo 3 lines syllable count 10/7/6 Quatrain 4 lines 10 syllables each lines 2 and 4 rhyme Tanka 5 lines syllable count 5/7/5/7/7

Copyright © | Year Posted 2016




Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem.

Please Login to post a comment

Date: 8/23/2016 11:15:00 AM
John, congratulations on your win enjoyed reading Hugs Eve
Login to Reply
Hamilton Avatar
John Hamilton
Date: 8/23/2016 6:07:00 PM
Thanks Eve was a good contest, stiff competition, but I'm pleased.
Date: 8/22/2016 1:36:00 PM
John, a big CONGRATULATIONS on your win in my contest with this wonderful poem ~
Login to Reply
Hamilton Avatar
John Hamilton
Date: 8/22/2016 5:43:00 PM
Thanks Constance was a good challenge, with many fine entries, thanks for you kind consideration of my humble offering.
Date: 8/22/2016 12:31:00 PM
John, such a wonderful take on this contest, it's different and thats why I love it so much! congrats on your placement in the contest :)-luloo
Login to Reply
Hamilton Avatar
John Hamilton
Date: 8/22/2016 12:39:00 PM
Thanks Laura, my sisters name is Laura, don't think I told you, anyway, appreciate your supportive comments.
Date: 8/17/2016 3:59:00 PM
Oh, I love this metaphor. It will do GREAT!
Login to Reply
Hamilton Avatar
John Hamilton
Date: 8/17/2016 5:34:00 PM
Thanks Andrea hope so, there are a lot of good ones.
Date: 8/16/2016 4:23:00 AM
Great write with subtle personification:) but hadn't you entered another poem for the contest?
Login to Reply
Hamilton Avatar
John Hamilton
Date: 8/16/2016 5:42:00 AM
Thanks Jo, what a memory! I wasn't happy with the flow and content of the other one, a little too dark, I think the sponsor is looking for a little lighter tone, so I deleted the other and replaced it.Thanks for noticing.
Date: 8/15/2016 3:18:00 PM
Great write John. The answer is, it starts at home! Little clouds learn from big clouds.
Login to Reply
Hamilton Avatar
John Hamilton
Date: 8/15/2016 6:19:00 PM
Ha Ha you got that right, thanks Daniel.
Date: 8/15/2016 12:21:00 PM
i am reminded of how we become so jaded when innocence of the child within in not nourished... greeat way to personify this through clouds, john.. marvelous!..huggs
Login to Reply
Hamilton Avatar
John Hamilton
Date: 8/15/2016 6:18:00 PM
Thanks Nette always appreciate your visits.
Date: 8/15/2016 6:49:00 AM
So lovely John, you carry such a wonderful flow as always...:)-luloo
Login to Reply
Hamilton Avatar
John Hamilton
Date: 8/15/2016 10:46:00 AM
Thanks Laura, personification writes are one of my favourites, with hidden messages.

Book: Reflection on the Important Things