The Deepest Well

(Sick with grief over the loss of our old blind cat, sick because we'd put her our last night to vomit up a hairball and then forgot to let her back in. In the morning I find her dead on the highway, at least it was a quick death. But old BD was a remarkable cat who went through so much she became something other than just a cat...) "The Deepest Well" (for DB) The physiology of grief is an interesting thing the way it tugs on our deepest memories activating layers of neural nets in a rush-hour tangle of ghosts. You were our Diamond Back. Of so many lives, we all lost count until we lost track of you putting you out to vomit up a hair ball then forgetting to let you back in. DB the blind cat in the morning remembering my mistake, calling and looking eventually finding you gone for good out on the highway. DB in sixteen years to travel so far to see so much even though blind and crippled and half deaf by the end. I wished you had lived forever As I do with all my loves because you became the best cat ever purified of all selfishness by all your suffering. In the morning there's a hole as we pile fresh roses in your grave so sad with what we have done the gentle friend we have lost with so many lives. (9/6/23)