My Winter's Wishes

In the May-time of my life time bloomed each day a prickly boll – but I, like the softest cotton within such a sharp seed swaddled in the purity of security for what seemed like eternity a lamb in His white embrace especially when flocked in celebration; the magic of a special Midnight Mass when windows stained with the Way of Sorrows awakened in the first inky inklings of the morrow flaring with His passion.. though the sun did doze with blazing swords reposed not able to pierce the panes of pain – yet so they blushed and bled on the eve of His birth – and oh.. aloft in the ethereal eyrie of the choir-loft I felt close to God my fourth-grade soprano in sing-song psalm rose and fell from perfect O’s my mouth formed notes as airy as bubbles cast from a round wand light and bright.. and as devout as winged cherubs flitting above the Nativity yes.. they ascended from prayerful lips ..effortless.. I sang of an Angel heralding the birth of the newborn King and for all the faithful to come adore Him vocal music wafted in flight lifted and lilted to balcony heights turtle dove breaths filled with carols fluttered from a pious voice box a precious jewel box rich with brilliant tone shimmer aswirl like gold-flake in Advent candlelight whirling down like a spiral of sound in wispy wreaths as enchanting as the first falling snow’s pirouette sweet and graceful and praiseful sugar-dusting the Monseigneur and pews filled with pairs of ears delighted in the congregation below my parents.. so proud.. turned to look up at me.. and as I basked in their Star of Bethlehem glow indeed, I did feel close to God — O soul when did I stop searching for you? for in the heat of my summer daze I grew wild a thorny vine entangled in a picket-fence of events ruinous to the morning glory of my rosy-rosary youth – and by the height of August dank with humid cling my very own hurricane gusted and busted in flooding the faith from the parish of my mind; the corrosion of saltwater corrupting the holy water in my veins and by the downfall of my Fall days - in a haze of fog and battering waves - October’s no-name nor'easter sank a nameless boat broken in spirit for I was no longer afloat as a child of God --- alas.. my once hallowed hull long since hollowed humiliated by my lack of humility now in the December-time of my life hair as gray as the teary air I drag a deadened heart beneath leaden skies like the ghost of Jacob Marley drags his chains.. longing to find the blonde girl unfazed the fleecy lamb in His white embrace the little singer who sang prayerful songs; the soprano I shed like a poppy-bloomed sheds its sepals... I sit alone in the chill by my windowsill the first season’s snow makes opaque the glass my aged reflection pasted over - yet enchanting a clean canvas to create a new portrait.. a flurry of frozen fallen stars stir a blizzard of wishes; to surrender and understand to apologize and un-harm those I harmed to glide as a star child like the lost Pleiad searching for loved ones on the right side of Heaven - but - my most fervent winter’s wish - as vibrant as a holly berry aflame on a snowy branch - as hot as the candle’s fire flickering on my heart’s altar.. indeed, my most fervent winter's wish is to feel close to God once again! O God humbly I pray please don’t let my winter’s wishes melt like snowflakes on my trite yet contrite tongue Susan Ashley December 8, 2021 ~ First Place ~ Premiere Contest: Inspirational Christian Sponsor: Regina McIntosh ~ Eighth Place ~ Premiere Contest: Winter Wishes Sponsor: Chantelle Anne Cooke *boll: the rounded seed capsule of plants such as cotton or flax. Cotton bolls are sharp and likely to tear tender skin and injure hands *eyrie: a nest; a high position or place *the lost Pleiad: one of the seven sister stars in a celestial cluster called the Pleiades that is not easily visible to the unaided eye