My Future

Do I have a future?
Sure, I have a present.
I exist, but for how long now?
I am weary.  I try to rest.
Is death near?
I don’t know.
I bear life alone.
The horizon is invisible and dark.

I wake at all hours.
I never rest.
The ebbing moon is dark and delusionary.
Dark clouds destroy all hope.
And there is no comfort in silence.
Dawn soon comes.
My heart pounds like mad.
Perhaps it is my time.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2024

Poem

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Proxenos Avatar
December 4, 2024 at 12:59 AM
Hi Victor, You are such a talented poet and have so many friends on soup, and I for one want you around for much longer. God knows you well Victor and will call you one day when he thinks it is time. Don't be in a hurry to go anywhere yet, you have still things to do and poems to write. Blessings Jennifer.
Seeker Avatar
November 30, 2024 at 7:16 PM
“And there is no comfort in silence” ~ hmmm, why so Victor? A simple shift from thinking to feeling, animating the now-continuum with effervescence of love should do the trick in my opinion.
Rodrigues Avatar
November 30, 2024 at 7:31 AM
I can see pondering that as the length of days fall behind. An emotional with raw imagery at the end.
Kitchin Avatar
November 30, 2024 at 3:37 AM
Victor, a sad emotive poem. We all have dark days when we are ill or sad but also sunny days too. Hope you have many more sunny days. -hugs
Poet Avatar
November 29, 2024 at 9:48 AM
I totally sense how you're feeling. Just keep in mind you're not alone in this. There are plenty of writers here on the Soup who really appreciate and respect you. Take care of yourself, appreciate the beauty of every day, and continue to write wonderful poetry.
Messina Avatar
November 29, 2024 at 3:01 AM
You know what they say- "Today is the first day of the rest of your life" A sad write, my friend. Many can relate to (including myself). Hopefully we both will see many more moons. Great write, Victor.
Empress Avatar
November 29, 2024 at 12:16 AM
This is so sad dear victor and so powerful how youv expressed too, i hope you still have time and i hope you will get to rest more too. Its never easy i can imagine: your words here flow so well and is so well phrased in a way that truly is moving! Any reader would feel the depth of what youv delivered. Sending you light today and always
Edmonds  Avatar
November 28, 2024 at 7:39 PM
Dear Victor, I sympathise with the way that you feel, remember you are not alone, here on the Soup there’s many poets who think highly of you. Be kind to yourself, enjoy the beauty of each day and keep the poems coming our way… Beryl
Rolland Avatar
November 28, 2024 at 5:22 PM
heart breaking poem, i could feel the deep emotion, and will had no more, keep on the excellent writing poet victor
Buehler Avatar
November 28, 2024 at 2:41 PM
Dear Victor, everyone has those down days, but they will pass and smiles return. Your presence on the Soup is a constant joy.
Cunningham Avatar
November 28, 2024 at 10:15 AM
We all have those melancholy says when we feel every thing is against us. But things won't always be like that. You're never alone when you have God at your side. Tom
DiMino Avatar
November 28, 2024 at 8:24 AM
I know...the Golden years. You and God are a majority my friend. We will have faith and try to hang in there. Painful...I know. His will...and not ours. Blessings. Were we closer proximity, a game of chess, a glass of wine if allowed would help.
Read Avatar
November 28, 2024 at 8:10 AM
Hi Victor, there are times when I feel the same way, I'm now 76 going on 21,whenever I'm feeling down, l make an effort, and go out for a walk or visit a friend, as for your fast heartbeat, take Michael's advice and try some Dr Metoprolol I might even try some myself lol.
Bayles Avatar
November 28, 2024 at 8:08 AM
Such restlessness in this poem.
Andresen Avatar
November 28, 2024 at 8:03 AM
- We must be aware of living while we do it, Victor - The only thing that is certain in life is that we will die someday - Feeling more lonely around the holidays, for those who don't have a large network ... a time when one is extra vulnerable - A heartbreaking poem, my friend :( - hugs
Tor Avatar
November 28, 2024 at 7:37 AM
Victor you are not alone. God is with you my friend. If you must go know that it is a better place if you have accepted Christ into your heart. You are not alone for we must all go someday. I believe the rapture will take place in my lifetime maybe in yours so you do not have to experience death. Hang in there we are your family here. We are a Soupmail away. I am sorry your feeling melancholy on Thanksgiving. Know you are loved here and we love your poetry accept this Poem makes me sad for you.
Andresen Avatar
November 28, 2024 at 8:04 AM
<3
Tor Avatar
November 28, 2024 at 7:47 AM
You surely have a future. If your heart is pounding see a Dr Metoprolol is a great medication that Dr's prescribe to fast heartbeats. I am not a Dr but I read a lot and know of this great drug that helps so many control their heart from racing. If you feel lonely maybe you should start dating, you are never too old and you are a wonderful human being that can offer companionship to a woman who might be as lonely as you. There is a great site for Senior citizens called Seniorpeoplemeet. Just a suggestion my friend. Your Poetry reflects your beautiful heart. You would make a great partner to a Nice caring women. I am hoping you consider this my friend. God bless you Victor and take those dark clouds away... I'm here if you need me through Soup Mail...
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