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King of Spades

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16 August 2023

Contest: An Old Shovel Sponsor: John Lawless

You say I’m made to be a spade but that just curls my wings I sit here ready to scoop up the widest range of things Scooping apples off the ground and thrusting them all forward To where the wheelbarrow awaits as I denude the orchard They say to call a spade a spade is honesty at work I do not know who said that but he was a total jerk For spades can dig a tidy hole as that is what they’re for But I can dig a hole and I can do a whole lot more So if you call a spade a spade, it isn’t quite a sin But please accept that if you do, you may invert my grin For mixing sand and gravel in a mix of three in one Is something for a specialist, and I, indeed, am one So grab my handle, use your foot to push me in the ground Make a hole that’s very square or even one that’s round But when it comes to flinging all that soil to one side Only I can do it best for I’m so very wide Time was when a cellar-man would use me scooping coal And industry employed me as its furnace feeding soul I’ll always fight my corner and I’ll state my case real loud For I am no mere spade; I am a shovel and I’m proud!

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Mark Toney

Date: 9/17/2023 4:18:00 PM

Terry, I enjoyed your celebratory poem with it’s creative theme. “For I am no mere spade; I am a shovel and I’m proud!” Congratulations on your excellent win in John’s contest.

Terry Flood
Date: 9/18/2023 3:40:00 PM

Thanks, Mark. And congrats on your top placed win.

David Kavanagh

Date: 8/23/2023 12:45:00 AM

A shovel is certainly not a spade, ask anyone that’s tried to dig a hole or indeed mix cement with one, like this fool here, excellent one Terry, you may have buried the rest of the competition with it, bol, cheers David

Terry Flood
Date: 8/23/2023 12:55:00 AM

As a shovel, I confess that I over promoted my ability to dig holes. In my defence however… I could have been referring to sand or soft soil. What a shame Rum n Raisin didn’t have access to a shovel in R&R 4…. Hmmmm….

David Fisher

Date: 8/17/2023 5:06:00 PM

This is great... a poem that's as well grounded as its subject. And the last line's a winner, contest or not!

Terry Flood
Date: 8/17/2023 5:13:00 PM

Thanks, David. I use shovels and spades and often use whatever is nearest… MISTAKE! Spades is for spading, shovels is for shovelling!

Ilene Bauer

Date: 8/17/2023 1:07:00 PM

it's always great fun for me to come across a poem about a subject that is so ordinary that most would not find it worthy of writing about and you have done this shovel proud, terry!

Terry Flood
Date: 8/17/2023 3:02:00 PM

Thanks, Ilene. Can’t take credit for the subject matter; that’s down to the remit of John’s contest. I can, however, humbly accept your complement re the content ;-)

Tom Cunningham

Date: 8/17/2023 5:43:00 AM

We'd certainly be lost without them, I've got one my dad gave me, it's at least 70 years old now and no signs of wear and I've used it for snow, cement mixing you name it. Good luck in the contest. Tom

Tom Cunningham
Date: 8/17/2023 9:59:00 PM

Lol I believe there was.

Terry Flood
Date: 8/17/2023 3:04:00 PM

I’d just like to know where my shovel is never where I left it…. Hmm… wasn't there a detective called Sam Spade… or have I imagined that?

Deb M

Date: 8/17/2023 5:29:00 AM

Ha….what a great poem Terry… And the last line is a beauty! Debx

Terry Flood
Date: 8/17/2023 3:07:00 PM

Thanks, Deb. After my struggle with Rum n Raisin 3 (literally took ages) I was chuffed to start and finish this in around fifteen minutes (including re-edits). Glad you dug it!

Jan Allison

Date: 8/17/2023 3:54:00 AM

what a fun poem Terry, I think John will love this one - as for my entry... its pretty crap lol!:-) hugs Ja xx

Terry Flood
Date: 8/17/2023 3:10:00 PM

Thanks, Jan, but you do yourself down… judging by the comments you’ve received (with which I agree) your entry is as worthy as anyone’s.

Lin Lane

Date: 8/17/2023 2:36:00 AM

This is a terrific entry for John’s contest, Terry! In spades!

Terry Flood
Date: 8/17/2023 3:11:00 PM

Dig that, Lin. Thanks