I Opened Paris' Letter and Cry

I opened Paris' letter and cry my heart dropped my fingers trembled I opened Paris' letter mama it's been three days ... then the dam burst, not the happy kind unregretfully the kind that spells gloom sobs of tears roll down my face uncontrollably I see in my daughter such courage and bravery sleeping in a cardboard box Subsisting on poem money Intergrating with the street rats my oh my, who would have thought black bears chasing down river towards the both of us who would have thought I wipe the pain out of my eyes I even muse at ...at such red herrings, too my baby is too smart her last words in her letter mama get your feet wet it wasn't her softball coaches after all it was me it was me me trying to find a man me trying to find my whisperer she read my diary to have known this she was jealous, I don't blame her she didn't want me replacing her dad only had she warned me I am sickened, please God punish me to save Paris Selfish me trying to rekindle the flame Please God hear my prayer in time of need I vow a life of celibacy should she be found I promise on my life to you God I'll never sleep with man Selfish me Please bring my baby home I hold my head in my hands With nobody to rest my sorrows on a caring shoulder, an oasis It's me, help me my angels from the Heavens in my time of need I give alms in prayer and having a good heart yes I do Please my angels, look over me Next I see a Phoenix address Another red herring Postmaster traced the letter to Seattle My baby's smooth, I give her that much So reminiscent of her father I need to drive to Seattle, ASAP From Sacramento It's a 12 hour drive I can do it, I know I can Can I do it my angels from Heaven? the voices in my head becoming more prevalent during days of darkness, like now voices keep calling out, urging me on I'll need to get an emergency leave from work Do some research on the homeless culture Maybe it's best I integrate as a homeless person, too I can do it I can do it I'm on her trail As I yell from the crescent moon, yelling from a lost crater, my voice echoing Echoing, echoing My baby hears me I can sense it She hears me She'll see a basset hound coming upon her Yes she will She'll see a brown one, flapping and wagging her tail and licking her face happy yes she will Please let it happen I beg for salvation Please God look over us In our times of need Especially in the face of life, weather and man I'm leaving tonight as I close my eyes and cross myself connie pachecho 12/29/16