I Awkwardly, Ineptly, and Submissively Fumbled Thru Life

I awkwardly, ineptly, and submissively fumbled thru life..., whereat purposefulness rarely gained traction Fatherhood (half my life time ago) bolstered reasonable rhyme manifesting itself before these myopic bespectacled eyes. Infancy, babyhood, and Childhood evidenced, noticed, and witnessed adequate basic provisions, and no shortage of food engendered dynamic cohesion allowed, enabled, and provided "mama's boy" imbued, and attempted to compensate being socially withdrawn posting and answering personal classified advertisements, (while marital vows long since pledged), now in hindsight such risqué communiqués juvenile and lewd sense and sensibility of healthy emotional, mental and physical natural maturation social withdrawal did occlude invariably classmates found lack of responsiveness rude. Additionally, yours truly never field tested self reliance skill sets, but rather overstayed his welcome livingsocial with parents at 324 Level Road, whose patience he sorely tested ofttimes giving rise since hashtagged as dad's infamous midnight lectures heavily referencing expletives which vituperative ultimatums extemporaneously delivered courtesy paternal linkedin progenitor of mine when the doomsday clock struck twelve allowing, enabling, providing standing room only promising colorful denunciatory epithets assaulting, cannonading, firing... exploding character assassination verbal thermonuclear bombs squarely lobbed at unemployed sole son, his/him offspring afflicted then (three plus decades ago and now) with debilitating anxiety/ social panic, palmar hyperhidrosis, body dysmorphia, and irritable bowel for starters. I (a rather meek individual) stood still as a statue silently weathering such blistering, calumniating, excoriating, fulminating, haranguing brickbats upon a rather docile doodler with words, who essentially internalized torturous barrage vacuous warnings to shape up or ship out, which mother and father dearest doled out their version of abusive traumatic boot camp survival mode qualified as invisible contusions, fractures, infarctions, lesions, obstructions and ruinations upon psyche.