At the Edge of the Precipice

I do not know how men many we were or how we went, what we saw on the way nor do I know for what ungodly purport was ours or what goaded us on into deeper uncharted territory despite our tortured souls and aching bodies protesting to refrain . I vaguely recollect through my befogged mind some arcane words like Shoggoth and Mi- go and Dagon, so much gibberish and blubbering babble of deranged minds gone at once numb and addled with sights and sounds forbidden to man in his wildest dreams and thoughts. Through crenellated valleys grey misted in their troughs and crests and covered with slime or ooze as from some white-wormed denizens from unnamed and should-not-be-named lairs in regions in deep damp grottoes of infernal charnel mounds did I and my ill-fated team wander wild-eyed and unkempt. Do not ask me what we saw when we reached our goal for what my skulled orbs beheld or what my brain deciphered I know nor remember not all semblance of sense and sensibilities having fled with a volition not my own but driven by transfusions of thought telepathically imposed from without from the miasma. I know not whether to thank those who found me in the sorry state that they did - a blathering caricature of the human form more ape, nay, an ape has more intellect and dignity, than man- a creature more fit to dwell in the mire and morass of a cess-pit than tread the same hallowed soil or breathe the self-same vapors as civilized man. It was far better still that the group of kindly souls, most rightfully, had left me to my own contrivances and let me wander in my unknown quest for unknown and mysterious things best known to myself once but now lost to me forever. I find myself in these padded and strait-jacketedand dreary halls of Arkham standing at the edge of the precipice of an insurmountable mountain with an abyss at the foot, both of interminable depth and dark as the devil's heart. I have leaped from this vertiginous height perhaps a dozen times to end my misery but having felt all the terror and thrill of finding absolution, I find myself here again, and again.