Torn and Distant

Why? Why do I feel so gone? I'm now so distant I just don't belong Now I'm ripped away from existence I've become so transparent, I've lost all substance. Sitting nowhere, breathing fake air. I don't feel anymore, so I can't care It's about time I clear my throat And let out the hellish screams till I float I'd run a million from here Just to get out of this cage and escape fear You know you're screwed up when you crave pain You wanna bleed all throughout your brain The blood in my veins is proof of life I'm not sure if it's there, so I reveal it with a knife Not me anymore, don't know myself Prisoner in my own skin, I no longer comprehend health. It's all in the family So it must be okay It's all in the family Daddy used to say. He hurt me, he raped me He slashed me, he tore me He killed me, He tortured me, He loved my terror. I am my own army So let's retaliate Fight, Destroy Let me show him real hate Look at the fire in my eyes That roaring beast that will never hide I've lost all that I had, Blood seeps through my skin because it hurts so bad My shattered heart pounds against my breast, Scattered pieces cutting holes in my chest. Slowly I fade as I quickly drown. Covered in guilt, sequestered by sounds. Tilting off the edge, About to fall off, My mind's so lacerated It's become leathery and soft.