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The Optimistic Pessimists Resolutions

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Below is the poem entitled The Optimistic Pessimists Resolutions which was written by poet Tony Lane. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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The Optimistic Pessimists Resolutions

Get in shape, lose some weight. Every year it’s always the same. Read a book, stay home and cook, And I only have myself to blame. Till some land, lend a hand. You’d think that I’d be smart enough, Cards to send to a sick friend, To ignore this self-improvement stuff. Get more sleep, don’t sell cheap. But it is an annual institution, Take a class, use less gas. To make a New Year’s resolution. Eat less meat, be more discrete, Why must they always be so hard? Be more caring, try more sharing, This time of year puts me on my guard. Be more polite, sleep at night, I wish for an easy way I will confess. Work hard all day, don’t over stay, To keep the resolutions that I express. Only say what you mean today, What if I only made an easy pick? Do your best to skew the test, Then my word would surely stick. Eat more snacks, take more naps, I’ll confuse my karma and trick it. Watch TV, look out for me, This might be just the ticket. Stay up late while cheating fate, This is a New Year’s revolution, I’ll make my list then I’ll insist, That I keep this year’s resolution. And when it’s time to stay in line, But my promises I fail to keep. I’ll not hide as I backslide, As the benefits I will reap. I’ll be complete whenever I cheat, And by default I’ll do what I should. It won’t make me sad when I do bad, Because my failing will only do me good.

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  1. Date: 12/28/2011 9:43:00 PM
    Someone made referemce to your poem, Tony..said it is brilliant and I agree. It also made me laugh!!! I have decided since last New Year...No More Resolutions! : ) Here's wishing you a very Happy New Year! Annalise

  1. Date: 12/26/2011 5:35:00 PM
    I had to come back to this poem for a second comment and to be sure I gave you a score (7) because this poem/rhyme is so fun to recite. I can't wait to share it with my co-workers. Really... Tony this four line stanza concept wherein you are in synch every other line all through out is just brilliant. This is what makes this poem, this back and forth concept that you stay true to throughout the piece. and of course the title is 'spot on'.... okay, enough gushing, clay (:D))

  1. Date: 12/26/2011 5:20:00 PM
    Love the concept... fun to read... and I must agree with Arild Ertsland 'bout the smile going all way 'round but my ears got in the way... lol

  1. Date: 12/22/2011 10:19:00 AM
    Did you read my list. Tony. Oh those lists we make and cannot in reality keep. I am up to 13 so far on my list this year.

  1. Date: 12/17/2011 10:29:00 AM
    a pretty confusing resolution for me Tony and I guess that's ithe idea.... I can make it out to mean anything I want it to mean and that's my kind of resolution. It's a keeper. and oh btw ... reckon ah'm mighty pleased ya stopped over ta ma place a spell an sed a word er two 'bout ma pottry. We be thainkin' y'all Tony

  1. Date: 12/17/2011 5:50:00 AM
    Oh, Tony LOL. Love the idea of a NEW YEAR REVOLUTION. Gather the masses. We'll eat too much and promise to gain weight and spend too much time in front of the TV and refuse to beat ourselves up.... lol...

  1. Date: 12/16/2011 6:14:00 PM
    Loved this Tony thank you , Declan

  1. Date: 12/16/2011 3:19:00 PM
    I normally read your poem with a smile,Tony! If it weren`t for my ears,this time the smile would`ve gone all the way around my head:) Happy Holidays

  1. Date: 12/16/2011 11:56:00 AM
    You sure have a lot of stuff loaded to work on my friend. Just keep one or two and I'll forgive for the rest.

  1. Date: 12/16/2011 10:15:00 AM
    This is great, Tony! Kim

  1. Date: 12/16/2011 9:54:00 AM
    Tony this is my favorite poem from you (I just added it to my fav. along w/ you turkey poem)! it!

  1. Date: 12/16/2011 7:46:00 AM
    I enjoyed reading your poetry this morning Tony. I hope you have a wonderful weekend. I am going to see if I can write something for a couple contests this weekend. Hope you find the inspiration to do the same. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you and yours. Love, Carol

  1. Date: 12/16/2011 7:33:00 AM
    This makes excellent sense to me, as I am one who vainly says I will do this or that more diligently, and then, my stubbornness kicks in, whether I wish it to, or not. Happy Holidays, Tony! Catie :)

  1. Date: 12/16/2011 7:23:00 AM
    Wow what a brilliant resolution. eel done love it x

  1. Date: 12/16/2011 7:09:00 AM
    It's getting expensive on oil of olaya but heh, laughter is smooth, so cheers to you, that you may achieve and tame the wild horse in you, and if you cheat, then yummy. Love,vie