Illyanna De La Keur | + Follow Poet |
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Screaming In My Head

I know that I'm loved,
I have a great family,
So why do I feel crushed?
It's beyond my sanity.

I don't know what is wrong with me,
I want the craziness to leave my head,
I'm the comedian to fill everyone with glee,
I have to fix it before I'm dead.

I stand on the stage of life,
No jokes just stress and fright,
I have only a little strife,
But I wanna cry most every night.

I am happy with my sis and children,
I don't want them to feel blamed,
My problems are all in my head and it is hurting,
It is me who should be ashamed.

Bi polar, schizophrenia, or just insanity,
Please bear with me I'm trying to get help,
I couldn't ask for a better life even in fantasy,
Without your love and support I don't know what I'd be dealt.

I love you please don't give up on me,
I'll try harder and strive to show my happy face,
I cannot live without you don't you see,
No one can ever take your place.

The quicksand that's sucking me under,
I'm holding out my hand to you,
My sickness does my mind plunder,
I'm on my knees trying to keep everything in view.

I'm blessed to have such support,
I'll work really hard to let myself resurface,
Thank you for caring enough to stay my  safe port,
I promise to retake my rightful place.

Our family I will repair,
I will strive to fix this up,
I will cause no more despair,
From this day forward I'll drink from a full cup.


Dedicated to Aleera

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Dane Ann Smith-Johnsen Date: 5/4/2009 4:58:00 PM This is a beautiful poem because it is so honest and so heartfelt. Mental illness can be a plague. Hang in there. When I was young, I was up and down up and down with no understanding. Now, I'm old I made it without dying, but it wasn't easy. You can do this. You will get through whatever it is that is hurting your mind. I don't know whether you believe in God, but He can help. When ill thoughts enter, read the Bible, sing a song, or write. It helped me. God be with you. Love, Dane Login to Reply

Kristy De La Keur Scoville Date: 4/20/2009 8:12:00 PM Now I am the one crying.... Login to Reply

Aleera De La Keur Date: 4/20/2009 1:08:00 PM I know its hard babe and I wasn't meaning to hurt your feelings I try really hard to understand, but it just breaks my heart that you have these issues to deal with. And I know I am NOT an easy person to live with, trust and believe that! Especially feeling damaged by a certain JERK doesn't help. Bottom line I love you, crazy or not here I come.....Love Aleera Login to Reply