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Passed out

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Below is the poem entitled Passed out which was written by poet Judy Riley. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Passed out

Toot, toot goes the train.
Jump, jump goes the brain.
Moved to a new house.
Old one had a mouse.
Sometimes change is good.

It's all the same!
Play the sleep game!

I can't sleep!
I can't sleep!

Passed out!
Passed out! 


This is a Dimished Hexaverse, thank you Dr. Ram Mehta for correcting me. This is a fun type of poetry.

Copyright © Judy Riley

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  1. Date: 5/16/2011 5:41:00 PM
    Congratulations on your poem being featured this week, Judy

  1. Date: 5/16/2011 12:59:00 PM
    Congratulations on your featured write this week Judy. Love, Carol

  1. Date: 5/1/2011 1:36:00 PM
    This fun to read!! Although try reading it "Sometimes good is change". It rhymes a little better. That is the way my mind read it.

  1. Date: 4/1/2011 10:47:00 AM
    Another week has come and gone and I haven't been able to read as much this week as I had wanted. I am glad I was able to read your poetry today Judy. Keep your pen scrolling don't let the ink dry up. I hope you have a wonderful weekend of sunshine and joy and find lots of inspiration along the way. Love, Carol

  1. Date: 3/31/2011 8:16:00 PM
    Lol This was a fun read! I kinda rapped/sang it out loud XD. It just had the flow that allowed me so. Much enjoyed!

  1. Date: 3/31/2011 5:40:00 PM
    What you have written is called Dimished hexaverse and you have done it perfectly, Judy. Please look into Forms of Poetry on the main page on the right side scrolling down to resources.

  1. Date: 3/31/2011 4:28:00 PM
    What a wonderful form, I must try it, and I had the same problem last night~~

  1. Date: 3/31/2011 3:24:00 PM

  1. Date: 3/31/2011 3:20:00 PM
    ok, i liked