New Creation Feb 19 2011

I wonder sometimes how my life would be, living without this mental disease. They run my life and everything I do, controlling me however they please. With the anxiety, the doubt and the insecurity I feel, it grabs me like a thief. Holding on to all the I am, I live a life full of misery and grief. I am fading away into a new creation forming, molding my soul to fit the evil within. Dazed and confused, lost to who I've become, the devil in my eyes and n attitude to my grin. I wake up every morning, to a train wreck in my head. The voices are so loud and distorted, but I can't understand what's being said. Day in and day out, I live inside m own personal h*ll. Constantly I find myself spacing off, my only way to take control, I rebel. My deepest inner thoughts, are place upon the highest shelf. I have locked them safely away, my only protection for myself.