My Sunflower

I smiled though it hurts. She was tired and talked about the difference in our feelings, negative thoughts destroys the heart. It’s important not to hurt, the pain isn’t worth the tightness in the chest and the fighting of stressed caused. Feeling kind of lost, walls closing in. Breathing difficult. My heart skipped several beats. No tempo. No more songs with memories of our past. Today loneness will be the key. Healing and realizing the truth never told from her lips. And She deserves to be happy? I’m not sure. Thoughts of her loving someone else crossed my mind. Lack of love and a not so lucky clover, last attempts to hold her. She’s cold. Coaching myself, I’m fine. Compared to a stop watch, I’m out of time, my struggles controlled my actions and I’m left alone once again. Not the best decisions made; my heart won’t feel the same knowing I’m the blame for this connection lost. So I'll just smile with the memories of better days as the sun rays kiss the lips of the Sunflower open green fields covered with four leaf clovers. Walking away with last expressions as it begins to rain, no more pain. My Sunflower left in the field for the picking. Praying that this time, somehow she's left happy.