My First Fish Food

I was seven ~ war coming on living with aunts, uncles ~ parents divorced anon the church I walked to ~ the road seemed long in Minnesota ~ not woe be gone! A Catholic school, name of Saint, nuns to teach their way I was given a chore ~ first grader, to explore "feed the goldfish" each and every day my stomach growled, no food along the way! I snuck a tiny bit and chewed the wafer tasted wan, no flavor good a twinge of guilt, not understood, this was a curious interlude! I did excuse my hunger's breech, and mustered onward for the teach! then years of learning, constant, same 'til finally my big day came! The first Communion, dressed to take white shoes, socks, veil for my sake all shyness, but now I belong I'm here and marching with the throng! The priest with golden cup, signalling again he handed me a wafer, round & white & trim spoke, placing in my mouth, Body of Christ in Him my moment up, arose from kneeling then. It had no real flavor, & melted on my tongue "it tastes the same as fish food" I wondered what I'd done ~ it must be some occasion, to teach me right from wrong! A hungry child in quest of food then spiritual trek's renown now, later years, abruptly all seems gone embarassing moments, where conscience seems to spawn! I've never stolen outright just trivia here & there, like extra soap in hotels, and sugar packs, lunch fares! Some queeziness reminds me, what makes a thief get on by hoarding others treasures forfeiting from where they've come! -cont'd- I guess Lord, that's a lesson the smallest feet guilt numbs and on my pride's occasion I wanted just to run! The conscience's not a ration it's vibrant, life, not pawn the smallest errors echo truth's hidden challenge fawns!