Mrs. Claus was getting tired of it
He was getting too fat and it would not fit
Her fingers were bleeding from trying to sew him in
Why does he get all the attention when I have to work on him?
Oh, those elves making all that noise
It is 2012 put up a sound barrier while making those toys
Papa Claus knows I like to watch my “soaps” at twelve
But with all that noise I just say, ‘What the hell!’
And the elves are afraid of reindeer, so no one helps a bit
I have to feed them, water them, make sure their ready for their trip.
Rudolf’s nose is not always so bright; I have to shine it every night
And when he has a cold, oh my goodness it makes me want to spit.
But, I do it for the boys and girls
Besides, I stamp my name on all those toys
I maybe Santa’s sidekick
But he would not get a thing done without me, not a lick!
("Soaps" is short for “Soap Operas” and "not a lick" is slang for “not anything” )
©Holly P. Moore