Looking Over My Past Mistakes

im looking over my past mistakes, i just want to die, every time my heart breaks, im cold like ice, in chocolate shakes, i cant even tell, the realls from the fakes. he doesnt ask, he just takes, and i say no, to the stuff he makes, its like im drowning, in shimmering red lakes. im looking over, my past mistakes, i eat the pies, and destroy the cakes, its like im reborn, every time my heart breaks. looking over my past mistakes, its not as easy as it sounds, my mind is a cat, surrounded by hounds. theres only one way to destroy it, one way it can end, i pick up some nails, and give them a bend. i have knowledge to give, but no money to spend, wich would you rather have? i just want it to end. but just because i want that, doesnt mean i want to die, but i want to be free, theres a difference, in one you can fly. sometimes i think, i just wonder why, im always gonna fail, so why do i try? its time to stop, and grow the hell up, but how can i, with the mind of a pup? there, i said it, this time im done, its time to go out in the world, and finally have fun.