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Kites Flight

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Below is the poem entitled Kites Flight which was written by poet Black Eyed Susan. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Kites Flight

Red kite loses flight 
Bump bump bumping through the grass   
She runs to recast
     Kite snags on a jagged rock
     Rips a hole inside girl’s heart	


3/30/12 - Revised 4/2/12
for "Let's Go Fly a Kite" contest


A big thanks to Andrea for her ideas and suggestions over the past year that have made my writing better :)

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  1. Date: 4/16/2012 10:07:00 PM
    A wonderful journey with your Kite and congratulations on your winning piece Susan xx

  1. Date: 4/16/2012 1:07:00 PM
    Congratulations on your win in Gwen's "Lets Go Fly A Kite" contest Susan. Love, Carol

  1. Date: 4/15/2012 9:41:00 PM
    Susan!!Congratulations on your win! This is so adorable! So much said--so few words...Brava! big hugs,love deb

  1. Date: 4/15/2012 7:00:00 PM
    The bump bump bump was so adorable as I could envision this kite's plunge and see the distraught little girl. Congrats on a winning write in my kite contest! :) Love, Gwendolen

  1. Date: 4/14/2012 11:41:00 PM
    A really good one, Susan. I always like your poem; simple, deep and entertaining! :)

  1. Date: 4/9/2012 7:23:00 AM
    Different but wonderful ending for this lovely verse. I enjoyed so much!

  1. Date: 4/6/2012 12:30:00 PM
    just letting u know Susan u have been "bitten" by Andrea.. she is going to let u know also.. regarding my new contst.. so once u enter your poem.. u must "bite" another poet luv.. happy easter blessings too..

  1. Date: 4/4/2012 1:40:00 PM
    oh, susan... a unique tanka with such senstive appeal.. thank you for enjoying my tanka for your recent contest... winning wishes and huggs!..:)

  1. Date: 4/4/2012 8:34:00 AM
    hey Susan love this, reminds me of my granddaughter, it happened to her..good luck..David

  1. Date: 4/4/2012 7:32:00 AM
    What a TWIST, Susan. it's quite different from before. you are a real sweetie to thank me for suggestions. I value yours as well and am really thankful to have made such a good friend as you!

  1. Date: 4/4/2012 12:50:00 AM
    Thank you Susan for the much appreciated honour given to my tanka.Easter blessings to you and your family.Rgds Brian

  1. Date: 4/3/2012 1:52:00 AM
    This is a really cool tanka, Susan! I liked how animated this seems, especially with the 2nd line-- I can almost see this scene unfold. And so true, that last line! Wish you the best in the contest and thanks so much for my placement in your tanka contest :D

  1. Date: 4/2/2012 4:21:00 PM
    I love your tanka also, best of luck in the contest and thanks for my placement in your Old Tanka Contest, I am really happy.

  1. Date: 4/2/2012 11:21:00 AM
    What a nice dedication to Andrea.....and I love the take you used on this Kite challenge!! One usually equates kites with happy times....yours has a new, and intertesting twist!! Good luck in the contest!!

  1. Date: 4/2/2012 9:35:00 AM
    clever and cool write Susan.. and kudos to Andrea too.. she is a wonderful help here on PS and a tremendous friend.. good luck in contest.. thankxx so very much for my winning placement in your Tanka contest.. am so honored luv..

  1. Date: 4/1/2012 11:16:00 PM
    I found this to be a real good poem that gets you into the idea Susan...)