Final Fate

Final Fate What if each wave was to wash away All of the thoughts coming my way And my mind became a blank space; Of last thought, there was no trace. In complete oblivion my mind is now And no one will ever try to endow Me with a thought that was their own; Now my mind and body are left alone. I, on a new path, will have to start And pretend that I can play the part Of a poetry writer who is trying to find A new poem God will place in my mind. Words come out and arrived in my pen; I jot them down over and over again And I always start out with a clean slate So a better poem is my final fate. jthorn5656@atmc.net

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Poet Destroyer A

Date: 7/17/2013 9:38:00 AM

a fate you cannot deny, enjoyed your write, ~always, Linda

Mike Dailey

Date: 7/16/2013 3:14:00 PM

I liked this up to the last verse. You changed your perspective in line 2 but the word will does not convey that. Change will to I and you have a good line. 3rd line might be better if you changed should to I so as to maintain the perspective. In your last line - greatest and best are competing with each other. drop one of them. So a better poem is my final fate.

April Gabriella

Date: 7/16/2013 2:54:00 PM

I really like this. Love the way it is written and rhymed. :)