Faces of Loneliness
I stare across the concrete ocean.
People evaporate like raindrops
in the heat of summer skies. Dreams of love
become the vapors, disappearing before my
eyes. I feel alive in the pain; yearning
pours from the depths of my soul,
all I abhor…loneliness pounds in my head,
stealing my every thought. On crowded
streets, I feel most alone. Amongst nameless
strangers I am lost, a foreigner without a home.
Then, there is she. I see her glide
through the faces. She, the perfect one,
with her flawless graces, her flowing hair;
she is but a shell of beauty, bare skin hiding
perversity, she woos with plastic smiles. Why
do they flock to her, entangled in her shallow words,
swallowing her seeds of lies? Her laughter hangs
in the blue. Why do they love her as she mangles?
Do I sound jealous? No…just lonely.
I wonder if she is lonely, too.
I walk further up the road where concrete
turns to pasture. Feet fall under rich,
velvet skies. If only I would disappear
into the darkness, surround myself with
anguished souls who wear masks
of day-to-day life, masks of lies. Trivial tasks
dilute their hours, passing the time until sleep
relieves despair; lonely faces blanketed until morning
light shines into their empty corners. I cross
familiar ground, places blinded by shadows.
Reminded, I am one of them.
Stained-glass yesterdays shatter, slashing
promises…I fall deeper and deeper
into my wounds, crashing. Who will rescue me
from bitterness? No answer…
The deafening silence of humanity
never explained. I hear only my own wails of mercy
to God. Love never fails…I hear the words from my
own lips feigned, and I realize…I have never known love.
Some crawl to their deathbed, eyes fall, lonely;
their last words whispered to no one. Is this my fate?
I wait...No answer.
Copyright © Rhonda Johnson-Saunders | Year Posted 2013
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