Friend: He says I am a bad mother.
Me: What a mess.
Outcome: She feels broken, she’s falling down.
Hope: But she’s clenching her fists together now.
Friend (quiet and fearful): But what if he’s right?
Me: Tell him to look in the mirror!
Outcome: Her eyes meet my face, but skitter away (ashamed)
Hope: She is resolute, she wants the finality of divorce.
Friend (agonising): What if his love is better than nothing?
Me: He is nothing; you deserve more!
Because he gives you nothing but exhaustion;
Because he takes your oxygen and says shut up;
Because he offers only negativity and your boys,
Your beautiful boys, what if they think
That is how you should treat a woman?
So, my friend, sucking once again on
Her nicotine cancer-sticks,
Which are healthier to the soul
Than him, the selfish beast.
She has walked away, on bended
Knees, her back bowed in shame,
With a swollen face that cannot hide tears, but
Rightly she concedes both of them share blame.
Their heartbroken song
Cruel and slow like Calexico
Her face is strained, bearing that smile;
Her teeth tightly clenched, all the while.
Although I would like to search for some place
Where divorce finds an easy location of blame,
Best I can tell, it rests on angry shoulders,
Under which none of us feel the same.
Her pretty face, bitterly contorted;
Her barely-40 face, shamefully weary;
I try to recognise such anger, such hatred;
And realise it is pride that has left her so teary.
Please, my friend, cease your screaming now.
Because he is not worthy of your voice
Becoming so worn and hoarse,
Divorce is indeed your best choice.
His poisoned love,
There is no need to pursue.
He is not the lover
Who you originally knew.
Please, my friend, cease your crying now.
His lips mouth words of hope,
But you know the truth – he lies.
He just does not know how to cope.
You want to understand
How did this this mess unfold?
But know this: you are not to blame;
Nothing looks the same in such cold.
Your love song
Has become love lost.
Of which you should
Carefully consider the cost.
As for me?
I’m tired of being passive,
While he preys upon your fears.
I’m tired of wanting to fight,
Even as you shed for him more tears.
I’m tired of denied anger,
Especially when I see it in your eyes.
I’m tired of forced conversation,
When there is nothing but goodbye.
Know you are too.
But it is always easier on the outside
Than within something so hard to do.
Copyright © Debbie Lee