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Crazy Thoughts No 4

Jack Ellison Avatar Jack Ellison - LIFETIME Premium Member Jack Ellison - Premium MemberPremium Member Send Soup Mail Go to Poets Blog Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled Crazy Thoughts No 4 which was written by poet Jack Ellison. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Crazy Thoughts No 4

Babies have been known to crawl
Up to seven hundred feet a day
Better tie a rope tightly around them
Or they'll wind up miles away

Sex burns 360 calories per hour
Who has sex for an hour
Longest for me is seventy-three seconds
Burn more just having a shower 

In Finland every Donald Duck comic
Was banned a few decades ago
Betcha can't guess the reason why
He was naked down below

Summer on Uranus lasts 21 years
Packing my bags as I write
Better not forget the sun tan lotion
My epidermis is pure lily white

From around the age of thirty
Humans begin to shrink
Imagine we lived to a hundred and fifty
We'd be one inch tall methinks

During a normal human life span
Hearts beat more than two billion times
So anything less than that huge number
You're dead so it's time to recline

About 400 different kinds of microbes
Coexist on the human body
They don't even wait for an invitation
Like in-laws I find that shoddy

Only one in two billion people will live
To the age of one hundred sixteen
Sorry for all you nice folks out there
But I'm the one chosen it seems

Giraffes can clean their ears with their tongue
It's dangerous don't try this at home
It might just twist you into a pretzel
And even break a few bones!

© Jack Ellison 2012

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  1. Date: 11/12/2012 2:49:00 PM
    Lol, too funny, Jack. I like "I'm the one chosen it seems". Lol, great thinking! Love ya, Toquyen

    Ellison Avatar Jack Ellison
    Date: 11/12/2012 5:54:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Think I've just about exhausted this theme eh! LOL Glad I made you chuckle! LOve, Jack xox
  1. Date: 11/12/2012 2:35:00 PM
    My favorite is the microbes not waiting for an invitation... A lot like my kids... They just barge in whenever they want... But I don't want to stop them from coming home from college... Of course once they're there... they disappear to be with friends in parts unknown... LOL.

    Ellison Avatar Jack Ellison
    Date: 11/12/2012 5:53:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    But above all you gotta love 'em eh! Big huggeroonies, Jackers xox
  1. Date: 11/12/2012 1:25:00 PM
    To funny, what happend to the other one you posted??? I thought it was pretty funny.

    Ellison Avatar Jack Ellison
    Date: 11/12/2012 2:11:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    Well Richard, upon your advice I've reposted it! Here 'tis! LOL
    Lamoureux Avatar Richard Lamoureux
    Date: 11/12/2012 1:41:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    But Jack, you have to stay outside of the box. I also did not find it in bad taste. I think it is good to laugh at all the things that make us human. If it was me I would put it back.
    Ellison Avatar Jack Ellison
    Date: 11/12/2012 1:35:00 PM Block poet from commenting on your poetry

    After much consideration, took it down... thought it might have been in bad taste for some in this group! "Crazy Thoughts" are more what people expect of me! Cheers, Jack