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Blink

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Below is the poem entitled Blink which was written by poet wala na. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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Blink

A ship in a bottle…
that is who I am –
Never truly being able to sail free,
 trapped in melted silica.
How I yearn for this barrier to be shattered,
if only to ride the waves,
reaching then touching shore,
which happily tickles their feet...
Better yet, what I would give to be that sand.
How ironic that I put myself in this situation,
with only distorted images as my view.

 
She frolics in that vermilion dress,
as he happily makes footprints.
She shows him how the crab skitters past,
and they mimic its sideways walk.
The sun shines with them,
as the sea breeze dances along…

 
I hear their laughter,
but it is hollowed out
by the silent screaming waves of my heart…

 
I watch their happy scene unfold,
but my vision is blurred
by defiant tears that don’t dare fall.


I blink.

And see them clearly now…
They have moved on
             without me.




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  1. Date: 11/20/2011 11:08:00 AM
    ha ha poor bastard deserves never to find a lovely lady to love him

  1. Date: 11/16/2011 1:35:00 AM
    This sad poem gets DIGGit points from me! I love hearing from you! Thx, your comments and help are always appreciated. I did mean to use "exercised" in this case for the sake of wordplay. Mario, was a kid who never exercised (lifted weights,ect.) b4 prison. Exercise was key in helping the 7 years go by. He also became a poet! Mario requested it to be published. Upon , I will notify my editor/Publisher of the spelling change. Thank you, please continue to help if possible ~JOEY

  1. Date: 11/15/2011 2:48:00 PM
    Love the theme, because that is what it comes down to after so many years, just a "blink." Great stuff, nikko. Love, daver

  1. Date: 11/15/2011 9:44:00 AM
    now that i read this again, i still think lonliness, but perhaps the woman in the red dress is a memory of the speaker? remembering happier times before something came between them. (just another thought about how it could be interpreted) hope you are well :)

  1. Date: 11/15/2011 6:39:00 AM
    Sad, but passionatly perceptive about life and love lost. Wonderful poetry. (And thank you for being a community builder and for unselfishly sharing your time to read and encourage poetry on this site. My life took a swift new direction about 8 months ago, and I have not been able to reciprocate. My thanks go to every community builder who enjoys poetry and encourages other poets, like I once tried to do. I love you…all! Lovingly, Dane Ann)

  1. Date: 11/15/2011 6:30:00 AM
    I have already commented on this work.Thank you for reading mine.The title of my kite poem is The Kite(second page)

  1. Date: 11/14/2011 9:08:00 PM
    This moved me Nikko, I too can feel the aloneness you speak of and the end wraps it up with that touch of eloquence you give so easily. A specail one indeed!

  1. Date: 11/14/2011 6:09:00 AM
    Wow...I'm a cracker in a box....always getting crushed..on accident or purpose.. Nikko.. A very deep poem... That is why I never blink.... Unless I want sadness.... Anyways... My angle of light never leaves me... And I see things clearer in the dark...all alone... Like..now... Always, luv~p.d

    na Avatar wala na
    Date: 11/14/2011 9:00:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    good thing I clicked here-- heehee actually, I was thinking, is pd going all technical on me, talking about lighting and angles?? and come on, how I hope you're not all alone?
    A   Avatar Poet Destroyer A
    Date: 11/14/2011 6:10:00 AM Block poet from commenting on your poetry


    Angel...that is.lol
  1. Date: 11/13/2011 11:51:00 PM
    Thanks for catching my error. I fixed it to the way it was meant. My eyes must have been "worn out"

  1. Date: 11/13/2011 3:46:00 PM
    hey , NIkko, thanks for all your sweet comments today, here and at PFT. Luv ya,Andrea

  1. Date: 11/13/2011 2:15:00 PM
    I came back to this poem today hungry for another Nikko write....I shall just engross myself in the 2nd stanza. Just this scene alone is a pleasure to read. It stands alone as a poem of its own...frolicking and making footprints in the sand, imitating a crab's awkward walk. You wrote this sooo well. This scene represents a light hearted interaction between 2 lovers. So much flavor! ......hey , where's lil batty today. You should place a live cam in your mango tree. I'm curious what he's doin.

  1. Date: 11/13/2011 12:29:00 PM
    Oh, this is so sad, Nikko, yet I feel I can relate to that feeling of abandonment. Hugs, catie :)

  1. Date: 11/13/2011 10:05:00 AM
    This is really super nikko. I think sometimes I am stuck in that bottle too. I want to thank you for spotting my spelling error. I think that is awesome that you helped me. It could have cost me the contest. I mean I might not place anyways but with a spelling error for sure I would not.

  1. Date: 11/13/2011 10:04:00 AM
    Creative use of personification. The emotion comes through your words. Thank you for sharing them with us and for your kind comment. Have a good week. Karen

  1. Date: 11/12/2011 11:44:00 AM
    Sometimes that bottle become a comfort and we get so use to being in our own space it's scary.. love this piece Missy.. so many emotions evoked in me ;) hopefully you are in dreamland by now!! *mwahugs*

  1. Date: 11/12/2011 7:04:00 AM
    Fantastic write,Nikko.'a ship in bottle' great expression, which reveals everything.Lovinly,FAB.

  1. Date: 11/12/2011 3:47:00 AM
    Hi Nikko~Yipeeee! You got that pen of yours back to work! You left your fans sitting here all alone...as tho we were in a bottle just waiting for you to walk by. ha ha. This is the most unique angle for a poem..Encapsulated, alone,...reaching out....this is mar-vel-ous! It is true that everything seems so distorted when you suffer from loneliness...u captured the essence of this emotion so well. Hats off to you....(hats off to your pet bat too!!) Gwendolen

  1. Date: 11/12/2011 1:03:00 AM
    gosh, Nikko. what a wonder you are. Your poetic vision is so unique and your style is one of a kind. I would love to know what inspired this one and who is that couple you are watching!

  1. Date: 11/11/2011 7:20:00 PM
    I loved the personification in this write dear poet....a sad lonely road, being a human. Great write Nikko ! hAVE A WONDERFUL WEEKEND....MUCH LOVE, JAMES

  1. Date: 11/11/2011 3:51:00 PM
    Very creative way of writing this one..Enjoyed reading this eve..I am glad that I chose this one to read this eve..Thanks for the kind review of my work..Sara

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