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Betrayal

Betrayal is a bouquet of rainbow flames - blinding petals bound by vines that choke. A game of light and shadow, delusions dancing to distract across bruised walls. Truth looms in creases - in darkest corners, unseen, while naivety stacks like kindling: inverted pyramids of innocence that teeter precariously, igniting. And the same spark that drew the moth to the flame now brands with pain. Realization stamped with liquid wax, sealing the facts, stripping denial like chipped paint. Still, you sprinkle gasoline lies, licking the lungs, filling them up with sweet-nothing smoke. But in this ring of fire, it's too late. I must wait for the crescent of coal to cool - Then I cannot fool myself anymore.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2013




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Date: 3/27/2013 6:11:00 AM
I love how you've used fire, smoke, sparks, gasoline...all the hot stuff to descibe something like betrayal. It's very fitting. And a haibun, eh? I wanted to do one for Debbie's contest, but I had trouble with the theme.
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Date: 3/19/2013 9:02:00 AM
The subject certainly does sound hurt and betrayed. Very realistic. Nice touch with the little rhyme at the end. I find it interesting that you write sad poems so well, yet you are so encouraging and happy all the time, which I surely admire.
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Date: 2/26/2013 12:01:00 PM
Heather...what an amazing way to describe the brutal pain of realization...It has great depth and emotion...You have wonderful talent, my dear. I can't thank you enough for your faith in me and my work. I'm so so honored by your last post! :) Hugs!
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Date: 2/16/2013 8:25:00 AM
well written Heather......
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Date: 2/10/2013 7:31:00 PM
!!!
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Date: 2/4/2013 1:59:00 PM
Heather - Perfect use of a metaphor, and strong description. Appreciate your poetry. - Gail
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Date: 2/3/2013 4:03:00 AM
Great poem!
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Date: 2/2/2013 6:25:00 AM
And thanks for your latest comment...I like footles too... so in honor of your most kind comment...'I understand you're interested in meteorology, so if you permit would you mind telling me how's the: Weather, Heather?'...'From reading your poetry it's apparent that you sometimes take your writing very seriously.. on occasion you can be quite Sober, Ober'... (pretty bad, huh?...I'll try to do better next time)
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Date: 2/1/2013 9:10:00 PM
I have been absent from the soup for a while and yours is the first I read...it's not often I walk off choked up, I really had to take a minute, your poem is so very well written, you truly have a gift....... {Read}
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Date: 2/1/2013 11:47:00 AM
glad you liked my warmup tanka, sweetie. Waiting for some more new poetry from you!!
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Date: 2/1/2013 9:41:00 AM
Absolutely love the metaphors!!
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Date: 2/1/2013 8:51:00 AM
This is quite great.
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Date: 1/31/2013 11:55:00 AM
Great work with such wonderful poetic quality..The metaphoric language is great..Thanks for stopping by my work..I appreciate your visits there..Sara
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Date: 1/31/2013 8:36:00 AM
Very painful memories, I am glad you are stronger and wiser. My hope is that your heart is still open and tender. Based on how you express yourself and your beautiful smile I suspect it is. Thanks for stopping by and reading my poem, I appreciate your visits and thoughtful comments.
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Date: 1/30/2013 10:54:00 PM
I just love how you employed symbolism of fire and burning to show the betrayal. The ending where you wait for coal (to not fool yourself any longer) that is ACES.
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Date: 1/30/2013 6:31:00 PM
So nice to read your verse this evening. Hope you are OK Heather?Light & Love
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Heather Ober
Date: 1/30/2013 7:03:00 PM
Thanks, Debbie! I'm fine - just writing about something that happened a few years ago. I'm stronger and wiser now ;)
Date: 1/30/2013 2:35:00 PM
'A bouquet of rainbow flames - blinding petals'...what a description, what contrast!...kinda like the devil disguised as an angel, right?...I was delighted and very humbled by your comment on my 'water' poem...coming from you that is some kind of compliment, Heather...Blessings to you, my friend - Tim
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Heather Ober
Date: 1/30/2013 2:59:00 PM
Thank you so much, Tim! That's so kind of you to say. I'm 25 - I don't know if that's older or younger than you thought I was, but I am often told I look younger than I am! :)
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Tim Ryerson
Date: 1/30/2013 2:46:00 PM
Once again I have to say this...from your picture you look like a VERY young lady...so much wisdom and insight at such a young age? Amazing...
Date: 1/30/2013 2:28:00 PM
I seriously just shit myself reading this....3 times.
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Date: 1/30/2013 2:09:00 PM
This is a brilliant and wondrous write my friend! I am surely delighted by reading this remarkable poem this afternoon! What a tremendous piece, complete with an incredible power within, Great Work!!
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Date: 1/30/2013 12:31:00 PM
clever write, my friend - something I can relate to at the moment - very well put
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Heather Ober
Date: 1/30/2013 12:41:00 PM
Thank you. I'm so sorry to hear you can relate to this.. It's one of the worst feelings in the world. Hang in there!
Date: 1/30/2013 12:24:00 PM
A very giood description of betrayal..So much said..Well done..Charma
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Moon Shine
Date: 1/30/2013 2:30:00 PM
are you russian
Date: 1/30/2013 12:21:00 PM
Heather a wonderful write and I love your metaphors, excellent...David
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Book: Shattered Sighs