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against the current

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against the current

I grew up climbing mountains
Walking against the current
Always looking for a meaning for home 
My mind keeps throwing at me those thoughts like painful rocks
Trying to find answers for questions larger then the capacity of my mind
Time keeps on passing
I’m still fighting with feelings I will never understand
Day by day growing old
Always calculating the years of my age
Satisfied that I’m simply bigger year by year 
My life did not stop in spite of everything
But knowing that I have become no more then a stone
Makes me shiver 
Dissatisfied when looking at what I have done in my life
Where nothing can be found
I was always different
Never understood 
Disappoint by many
Today starting from now
Sadness, depression 
I will not give them the honor of occupying the pages of my life
I will greet tomorrow with a bright smile
I will celebrate my birthday
And not greave about the years that’s lost
I will move on
Seal my doors tightly
With every step I well plant flowers that will never wilt
I will search new memories 
That does not exist where disappointments and fractures

Copyright © Nesma Alnsour

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