Best Sexist Poems
(Cinderella is the protagonist of the 1697 fairytale by Charles Perrault. The whimsical tale is later told in 1812 by the Grimm brothers.)
“Why, if it isn’t my dear Cinderella,
That twinkle in your eyes, still bright as your ballroom days,
In your smile I still see the sweetness of Nutella,
And in your glow some golden summer rays.”
“How do you do, old friend?
My schedule has been quite busy,
The chores of a princess seem to have no end,
Should I say of a prince’s wife, who often returns tipsy.”
“I must ask, with all due respect,
Why let a man who but found a slipper
Behave in a manner so incorrect,
Out all night favoring a stripper?”
“Oh, dear, you must know,
The man’s delight is but for a show”
“Cinderella, holder of a sunrise’s beauty,
Tell me why you refuse to see,
Why you remain so carelessly happy,
Treated with no sense of dignity?”
“I have reached my happily ever after,
And I do still get my daily dose of laughter.”
“I hope that someday soon,
You will fulfill your own fate,
You will sing your own proud tune,
And leave this pitiful pig of a date.”
Categories:
sexist, 11th grade, fairy, fantasy,
Form:
Rhyme
Sexist Selective's
I’m getting old, easily confused,
So things take time to sink in,
Especially, from around our World,
Issues to behold, such daily news.
Now for some todays big thing to spoil it,
Is not famine or drought,
Nor is it the prospect of an impending war,
It seems Texas creates a controversial toilet.
In fact it has not actually created anything,
Merely stated that men born men are men,
And legislated that ladies, once again,
Are also ladies, which creates a sting.
You see the joy of the image of humanity,
Is our constant striving to adapt and change,
In this case gender is on the page,
Creating this particular new insanity.
For quite understandably, those we have changed,
Wish to be seen in the image of their new rights,
Men are now men, once again based on latest measure,
Ladies also, now could have been born a different range.
Now it strikes me, its really not that hard,
That the real issue here is the segregation of toilets,
Its the toilets that are the sexist selective’s,
Why not change their design, its not that hard.
Today, given the blessing of a flushing loo,
Which is denied to nearly half our World,
Surely we just have loo’s, no more hullabaloo,
All toilets unisex, the kindest and easiest thing we can do!
@Andrew Carnegie, flushing environmentally, Wiltshire Jan 6th 2017.
If you would like to know a bit about me and my poetry please click this link below:
https://youtu.be/Ic_V7aX4xbk
Categories:
sexist, angst, care, change, christian,
Form:
Quintain (English)
You complain of losing guys
To the transpiring battle of a pervert
When it seems you lost something besides your dignity
And they're dangling out of your shirt
Sorry to be so blunt
But I'm sick of this game
Cursing guys for wandering eyes
When they're not always to blame
Now I know they're still some
Where being a pervert is all he'll know
But atleast we could separate the good and bad
When you decide to put on some clothes
And its not just perversity
That gives guys a bad rap
But dealing with their everyday struggles
While putting up with all our drama and crap
How about when guys think about being the best
He is considered a pig and sexist
But if girls think of superiority
She's defined stronger than royalty
So nag as much as you want
Cause you're right, chivalry is dead
We murdered it!
Categories:
sexist, confusion,
Form:
Free verse
I just finished reading a new book
Which peers deep into human brains,
Methodically examining each sex
To see what is and isn’t the same,
And while men and women are much alike,
I was fascinated by the difference,
And how this could affect our world-views,
For example, I’m going to begin—
Sexist. Sexist! SEXIST!!!
You’re a sexist. Sexist! SEXIST!!!
But I’m talking about medical sci—
SEXIST!!!
Okay…so the other day I saw a report
About how hormones affect the mind,
Comparing estrogen and testosterone,
And both their effects over time.
Now we’ve known from the beginning
That these two do different things,
But it’s amazing looking at brains
To see their influence on thinking—
Sexist. Sexist! SEXIST!!!
You’re a sexist. Sexist! SEXIST!!!
But this stuff is well known. Ask anyone who’s had gender reassign—
SEXIST!!!
Fine…so the other night on cable
There was this great documentary,
About hold cold, ice age conditions
Changed and shaped our bodies.
Hey had a fascinating discussion
About how the musculature of males
Played a big role in mate selection,
And the food that was avail—
Sexist. Sexist! SEXIST!!!
You’re a sexist. Sexist! SEXIST!!!
Oh, shut the hell up you shrill, whining harpies! Reality doesn’t care about your god-damn chants and propaganda. We’re like any other sexually dimorphic species, so use you damn reason for once and stop screaming like petulant children!
(Stunned silence)
Uhm, so, like…would you wanna maybe go do something later?
(More stunned silence)
Unbelievable…
What? We can go back to my place. I’ll put the cats in their cages and we’ll have the whole studio apartment to ourselv—
(Sound of running)
Hey?! Come back! SEXIST!!!
Categories:
sexist, gender, men, political, repetition,
Form:
The Sexist Airline Passenger
By Elton Camp
The passengers boarded for the flight
To one man it didn’t seem quite right
In the pilot’s seat a woman sat
“Hey I don’t know about that!”
“Onboard I will not remain
If a woman flies this plane.”
With utter scorn, another man said
“Get such stuff out of your head”
“Ideas like that are so out of date.
To hear such talk, I sure do hate!”
“She can keep this plane on track.
It’s not like she’ll need to back!”
Categories:
sexist, humor,
Form:
Rhyme
Much like this poem,
women have been made
smaller over time:
speak less, don’t ask that,
cover up, unless
you’re with a man,
selling something
or on a screen.
As a mother
though don’t cry,
say that this
is hard work.
Girls' words?
Please just
stop.
Categories:
sexist, for her,
Form:
Diminished Hexaverse
Mr. Emmanuel Cleaver has an old Testament name
It means 'God is with us;' of that he's not ashamed
But 'Amen' is sexist, or so he's decided
On that, Mr. Cleaver is sorely misguided
_________________________________________
'Emmanuel' is a name derived from the Hebrew
words 'El,' God, and 'Imanu,' with us.
'Amen' is a Hebrew word meaning 'belief.' It has
nothing to do with men or women whatsoever.
Categories:
sexist, gender, prayer, words,
Form:
Clerihew
A Sexist Crime
We would call all of this a sexist crime;
A woman for President is not the time;
Republicans decided,
And females derided;
Were immature and not met their prime.
They could be called incorrigibles who voted
Trump into power. They may constitute a
vote but who really wants them? They are
only needed so you can be voted into office.
After that, they are just victims of circumstances.
Some Trump weird cheering crowd they seem to
be.
Jim Horn
Categories:
sexist, allegory, analogy,
Form:
Limerick
Sexist Who Will Exist and Enlist Horn Haiku
we know a sexist
who forever will exist
would like to enlist
Categories:
sexist, analogy,
Form:
Haiku