Best Darnedest Poems

Mister,
Why did you hit Mommy?

Mister,
You can't punish me,
You're not my daddy!

Mister, 
You say not to hit,
But your actions declare you a hypocrite.

Mister,
You push Mommy down,
But you say not to tell unless I say she fell.

Mister,
I try my darnedest to be good,
But you say I'm not...

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I was stumbling around the Poetry world when I ran into this Gem
The Blue Mountain Arts Poetry Card Contest. 
I thought, what an opportunity 
But then I read the rules and although 
I do not know who wrote them
I must say, "COME ON" Really !

Poetry...

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The yuletide is here, with all its trappings,
          And I'll count my blessings to finally see
               My favorite package, in all her...

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Dragons, how they love to eat;
What they eat the most are sweets.
Candy, baked goods, pudding drinks;
Rarely do they ever eat beets.

No asparagus carrots or broccoli;
They can be picky about meat.
No carrots, beans or salad greens;
Just the pleasant sugary treats.

The darnedest thing about it though;
Diabetes they...

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Sticky handprints on my door
Muddy truck tracks across my floor
Laundry piling up galore
Imperfect photos for decor
These are the things a mom adores

Little feet headed towards my bed
The darnedest things my kids have said
Neatly cut corners on sandwich bread
These are the thoughts occupying my head

Watching as...

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Petersen House, Washington, D.C.  

(i admit to own a passion for the Civil War in general, 
and the life and death of 
the sixteenth president in particular).

between a hard spot of whiskey 
     and draughts of arrack
nonetheless (without doubt), this...

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Did you know God will give you the best
if that's what you want?
He will go to great length to make sure you have what you desire
He may lead you through twists and turns and work you like there is no tomorrow
But ultimately He will give...

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My given name is of no consequence.
You can call me Spider Girl.
It’s an appropriate name, I think. 

I’m indistinguishable in many ways 
from billions of other creatures just like me.
(Character building experiences 
tend to breed cartoons.)

I might appear pretty easy to step on
but don't underestimate...

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Ford's Theater, April 15th, 1865...
Petersen House, Washington, D.C.

I admit to own a passion
for the Civil War in general,
and the life and death of
the sixteenth president in particular
between a hard spot of whiskey
and draughts of arrack;
nonetheless (without doubt), this Yankee
would be fain to travel back
to Antebellum...

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Somewhere in time this Philosopher stonily ponders...

A poet (quite familiar with yours truly)
sat at his computer
trying his darnedest to craft a rhyme
imagining when both parents
of mine lived during their prime,
when me creative father acted out mime
though an amateur
his visible talent throwback
when Vaudevillian actors/actresses
(during silent film...

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M y brother turned his back to a flaming sky

said, "If ya seen one sunset you seen em all."

I was slowly losing my tiny empire

It was so upsetting to watch it fall

Every night before we'd go to bed

My brother would read from, "The Lord of...

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Though A Destitute Alteh Kocker...

(albeit boyish), I tell myself with pride
always look on the bright toothless side
of life, this nonconformist tried
his darnedest with
threadbare trappings to abide

despite bristling, harumphing,
and lamenting luckless life,
while woe didst ride
shotgun squeezing snotty
schnozzle, nuzzling nose, wide

dilating nostrils coquettishly cozying cold
conical snout splayed...

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Woodbury, new jersey home 
   to me self since birth
my very late mother 
   (bless her long departed soul)

   slaved and toiled 
   per accursed penury and dearth
tried her darnedest 
   to create happiness while on earth

would be...

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Filed under: Kids say and do the darnedest things


Little Man was a most curious child
Strange sounds in the night fascinated him
He would lay awake,
when he shoulda been asleep
And in the dark, those odd sounds
	would occasionally bump into his imagination
His auntie Alice had told him before...

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Umpteenth heat wave since onset of summer...
sizzles Delaware Valley today August 25th, 2021

Said geographical area composed of counties
located in Southeastern Pennsylvania,
South Jersey, Delaware, and
Eastern Shore of Maryland.

Sweltering temperatures
figuratively grip human zoo
bipedal hominids (yours truly,
an olive - garden variety simian)
seek much sought after shade
under whirled wide...

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