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Bolded words are body parts--Just for fun!

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Too Handsome In Honolulu

Dear Blabby
	There is a matter I must get off my chest.  I am due to marry in the fall, but now have cold feet.  My fiancé is a lot brainier than I am.  Intellectually, she’s head and shoulders above me.  I have to hand it to her.  But lately she’s been a pain in the neck.  She jumps down my throat whenever we don’t see eye to eye.  She makes me the butt of her jokes, venting her spleen.  She even gives me a tongue lashing whenever we have disagreements.
	Blabby, I don’t have the guts or the heart to level with her face to face.  You see, I don’t intend on marrying her, but haven’t the stomach to deal with my dilemma.  We’ve spent an arm and a leg for the wedding.  Just a short while ago we were head over heels in love.  But recently we’ve just been thumbing our noses at each other.  When I tell her I love her just to keep the peace, she elbows  me in the ribs before giving me the finger.
	Blabby, here’s the bottom line.  I am a very handsome young man.  Women find me irresistible.  My skin is flawless and bronzed.  My eyes shine like Burmese sapphires.  My hair is golden and wavy.  And as for my torso, arms, and legs?  I am a Greek god.  My fiancé is kind, brilliant, and giving, but she’s no raving beauty.  The mirror tells no lies.  I deserve a gorgeous wife.  Being modest and shy by nature, I ask your advice on how to break the news to her.
			
Too Handsome In Honolulu:

Dear Too Handsome,
	Tell her you are backing out to marry your one and only love, yourself.  Enjoy the honeymoon!  Aloha!
Copyright © | Year Posted 2022

Poem

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Horsman Avatar
August 13, 2022 at 7:18 PM
I'm adding my admiration, Robert. To this gem of poetry. Not only funny, but i sense a message in there, also. Love it.
Gorelick Avatar
August 13, 2022 at 7:31 PM
Glad I could give you a chuckle harry! Robert
Rose  Avatar
August 13, 2022 at 6:08 PM
lol Robert you really raise the bar to comedy here, this made me really laugh out loud, nice one, give us more, ...
Gorelick Avatar
August 13, 2022 at 6:19 PM
I thank you Mystic Rose for the encouragement and I will do just that! A real pleasure to make you laugh! Robert
Marcum Wong Avatar
August 12, 2022 at 11:58 PM
A witty delight Robert! This was clever and creative. A Fave for me. I laughed all the way through it. Your ending was classic! Bravo! Blessings xxoo
Gorelick Avatar
August 13, 2022 at 11:29 AM
Thank you, Connie, for the fave. It is my privilege to make you laugh! Blessings and be well. Robert
Wolf Avatar
August 6, 2022 at 11:49 PM
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! I think I actually felt this way about myself for a short time. ~ Over it long ago. ~ Aging in Place
Wolf Avatar
August 14, 2022 at 7:57 PM
Oh, trust me. This cat has had 8.5 lives. Really. :) gw
Gorelick Avatar
August 13, 2022 at 11:31 AM
What a shock never took you for a narcissist! Robert
Delaney Avatar
August 5, 2022 at 2:27 PM
This is clever and hilarious at the same time. I wonder if Dear Abby could settle it for him or if she could to refer it to Dear Gabby….. much fun, Robert. Aloha, SuZ
Gorelick Avatar
August 13, 2022 at 11:33 AM
Glad to add a little humor to your day, SuZ, Aloha! Robert
Hankins Avatar
August 5, 2022 at 8:08 AM
Ah, so clever and so well written, Robert. I would suggest marrying yourself, as Blabby replied.
Gorelick Avatar
August 13, 2022 at 11:35 AM
I just filed for a divorce, a real jerk! Thank you, Milton. Robert
Buhagiar Avatar
August 5, 2022 at 1:12 AM
You have so much in your favor. Find another girl ad kiss her in front of the ogre.
Gorelick Avatar
August 13, 2022 at 11:38 AM
Your advice is certainly worth taking. Thank you, Victor! Robert
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