This Ones For You (Part 1)

For all the times you made promises you had no intention of keeping, For all the times I needed you with me instead of out with your funky women, For all the times you made me feel insignificant and unimportant. This ones for you. For all the times you boldly took it upon yourself to brag about me and my achievements, For all the times you should have been staying instead of leaving, For all the times you neglected me and left my heart hurting. This ones for you. I always felt cheated in life by your lack of support, And no matter how much my mother tried to fill your shoes, the fact that you weren’t there really hurt. I am 25 years old and you still treat me like you weren’t the man who helped bring me life on this earth. Your neglectful ways really affected me years ago but I thank you because I now understand, respect, and honor my mother’s worth. She did everything you were supposed to do. She loved me unselfishly and taught me the real meaning of “to thine own self be true”. She did everything for me that you as my father were supposed to do. Yeah you sent the checks, but that little bit of change you really could have kept. It could never compensate your responsibility to me, but that’s something you obviously failed to see. Now my mother’s a humble and forgiving person so she’s already forgiven you. And of course she encourages me to, but I tell her that’s just something I can not do. You’ll never understand what harm years of neglect and selfishness can do. I’m a grown woman and you’re still making promises to me and never coming through. What kind of person neglects his only daughter, then up and raises the child of another? Did you think that would make-up for the father you should have been? You might as well drop that idea and start all over again. Until you make amends with me, peaceful is something your life will never be. I don’t wish you harm because I’m not a hateful person, But I have so much animosity towards you that loving and caring for you feels like the heaviest burden. It’s all for the better though cause God’s blessed me with a father figure that’s been long over due. He gives all the love and support you’ve failed to. He encourages me in everything I endeavor to do and he’s there even when things fall through. So maybe God has provided me a way to forgive you. Maybe that’s what part two of this poem will turn into. Until then dad, for all the fathering you didn’t do, This ones for you.