The Wayward Male
Her Mother says I'm not that bright
in need of supervision.
A wayward male who would likely fail
to make a good decision.
So I've lost my friends... they've disappeared,
my wife gave them the boot.
To up our standing and improve our branding
with people of high repute.
My diet's better so I'm eating greens,
no beer or fatty foods.
But I tell you plain, I try in vain
but I'm in a foul mood.
I dream of things I cannot have
like burgers doused in sauce.
A chicken wing and some onion rings,
all hidden from the Boss.
But her senses keen as she's rarely tricked
when I try to cheat.
She sets me straight then sets my plate
and tells me what to eat.
Our viewing habits are oft discussed
and we are of one accord.
No tennis courts or winter sports
and no watching zombie hordes.
My gaming suffers as she disapproves
so my Xbox gathers dust.
Though when out of sight, I still sneak at night
to satisfy my lust.
When I talk to her... she twists my words
to points of her own choosing.
A terse reply, she then starts to cry
which makes it more confusing.
What keeps me here? I love my wife,
would never find another.
So I will obey and I'm here to stay
just to piss off her dear Mother.
The End
^Follow my cartoon at Webtoon Bob's Your Uncle.
Copyright © David Mchattie | Year Posted 2019
Post Comments
Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.
Please
Login
to post a comment