Self-Loathe

Drowning in this whirlpool of emotions and facing the darkness myself Cyclones of flower petals pour all over the floor Their beauty I compare to myself Being force-fed the concept of beauty by shallow beings An objective subject not meant to be demolished by a screen Our definition , Our own bodies , Our own faiths , Our own soul Strong men , women , human beings preach about self-love They scream ; love yourself They accept themselves for who they are , but do I accept myself ? My skin , My body , My face I am the person I need to love the most but I try to become the person that society will accept My complexion , myself ; I am not an object I am a living , breathing human being with my own beliefs And yet I misplace my beliefs and I start to believe the shallow lies Am I enough ? What is missing ? How much of myself do I need to lose before I start to become a fresh canvas What else do I need to do to fit into society's mold? My friends tell me I'm enough but I'm so fixed by what it truly means to be beautiful To me , my opinion doesn't matter yet it does the most The truth ; I already know but I refuse to believe Destroying myself My mind in a state of war I'll always hate my complexion I'll never be enough , I'll never be more Contradiction A mixture of Self-love And self-loathe I Detest myself